Learn more about personaldevelopment with this collection
How to find common interests
How to be a good listener
How to overcome social anxiety
Instead of asking about their partner's thoughts and feelings, people sometimes decide that they "know" what their partners are thinking and feeling based only on faulty interpretations of their actions — and always assume it's negative!
It's important to keep in mind that we all come from a unique perspective, and work hard to assume nothing; really listen to the other person and let them explain where they are coming from.
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It's damaging to decide that there's a "right" way to look at things and a "wrong" way to look at things and that your way of seeing things is right.
Don't demand that your partner see things the same way, and don't take it as a personal attack if they have a different opinion.
Look ...
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58 reads
Rather than discussing in a calm, respectful manner, some people just don't say anything to their partner until they're ready to explode, and then blurt it out in an angry, hurtful way. This seems to be the less stressful route — avoiding an argument altogether — but usually causes more stress to...
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Some people interrupt, roll their eyes, and rehearse what they're going to say next instead of truly listening and attempting to understand their partner. This keeps you from seeing their point of view, and keeps your partner from wanting to see yours!
Don't underestimate the importance of...
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When something happens that they don’t like, some blow it out of proportion by making sweeping generalizations. Avoid starting sentences with, "You always," and, "You never," as in, "You always come home late!" or, "You never do what I want to do!" Stop and think about whether or not this is real...
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Rather than addressing a partner's complaints with willingness to understand the other person's point of view, defensive people deny any wrongdoing and avoid looking at the possibility that they could be contributing to a problem.
Denying responsibility may seem to alleviate stress in the s...
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Because conflict is virtually inevitable in relationships (and not necessarily a sign of trouble), you can reduce a significant amount of stress and strengthen your relationships at the same time if you build the knowledge and skills to handle conflict in a healthy way.
Destructive...
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Some people handle conflict by criticizing and blaming the other person for the situation. They see admitting any weakness on their own part as a weakening of their credibility, and avoid it at all costs, and even try to shame them for being "at fault."
Instead, try to view conflict as an o...
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Extensive experimentation recording more than 2000 brain patterns per person led to certain insights which were not possible before.
During a course of CBT, a person can learn to:
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