Learn more about books with this collection
Seeking support from others
Identifying the symptoms of burnout
Learning to say no
WHY IS IT so easy to repeat bad habits and so hard to form good ones?
It often feels difficult to keep good habits going for more than a few days, even with sincere effort and the occasional burst of motivation.
Habits like exercise, meditation, journaling, and cooking are reasonable for a day or two and then become a hassle.
Changing our habits is challenging for two reasons:
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Imagining two people resisting cigarette. When offered a smoke, the first person says, “No thanks. I’m trying to quit.” The second person declines by saying, “No thanks. I’m not a smoker.”
It’s a small difference, but this statement signals a shift in identity. Smoking was part of their fo...
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Your identity emerges out of your habits. You are not born with preset beliefs. Every belief, including those about yourself, is learned and conditioned through experience.
More precisely, your habits are how you embody your identity. When you make your bed each day, you embody the identity...
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It is concerned with changing your results: losing weight, publishing a book etc .
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This level is concerned with changing your beliefs: your worldview, your self-image, your judgement about yourself and others.
Outcomes are about what you get. Processes are about what you do. Identity is about what you believe.
Many people begin the process...
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It is concerned with changing your habits and systems: implementing a new routine at the gym, decluttering your desk for better workflow etc .
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When your behavior and your identity are fully aligned, you are no longer pursuing behavior change. You are simply acting like the type of person you already believe yourself to be.
Identity change can be a powerful force for self-improvement.
The biggest barrier to p...
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Our first mistake is that we try to change the wrong thing.
To understand what I mean, consider that there are three levels at which change can occur.
THREE LAYERS OF BEHAVIOR CHANGE
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Your actions define who you are. Our habits are a reflection of our identity. The more we repeat a behavior, the more we reinforce the identity associated with that behavior.
For example: if you make your bed every day, you are reinforcing the identity of someone who is...
We mistakenly attempt to change our habits while keeping our core identity. As we play our different roles, we have to switch to different identities, like a father, teacher, reader, speaker and entrepreneur.
One can derive many benefits from making this powerful subtle change o...
The process of behavior change always starts with awareness. You need to be aware of your habits before you can change them.
Pointing-and-Calling raises your level of awareness from a nonconscious habit to a more conscious level by verbalizing your actions.
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