We can't really control our feelings - Deepstash

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7 Tools That Will Help You Manage Emotions Effectively

We can't really control our feelings

But we can control our reactions to those feelings.

By increasing our awareness of emotions and their effects, and then focusing on our thoughts, we can learn to manage our emotional reactions effectively.

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IDEA EXTRACTED FROM:

7 Tools That Will Help You Manage Emotions Effectively

7 Tools That Will Help You Manage Emotions Effectively

https://www.inc.com/justin-bariso/7-ways-managing-your-emotions-is-like-watching-netflix.html

inc.com

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Key Ideas

Emotions

Our emotions are an integral part of our lives.
They protect us by alerting us to danger. They add colour to our lives and help us find meaning to our existence.

"The Neftlix method" to control emotions

  • The pause button. Create a habit of thoughtful action. Train yourself to take a moment to stop and think before you act or speak.
  • Volume control. Train yourself to recognise when your volume is starting to go up.
  • The tuning dial. As you'd change the film or change the channel, instead of focusing on what you're going to say next, tune in to the other person and listen carefully with the goal to truly understand them.
  • Mute. Hit the mute button if the other person is in a highly emotional state because sharing your point of view won't help at that moment.
  • Record. As you stay on mute, focus on mentally recording key points they're willing to share to help you learn more about their perspective.
  • Playback. Emotionally charged discussions are often rooted in deep-seated issues. Revisit the topic once both parties have had the time to cool down.
  • Fast forward. Think about the effects your actions will have in the long run.

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Pause

Pausing gives you time to stop and think before you act. Doing so can prevent you from doing things you'll later regret.

If you feel your emotions getting out of control, take a pause. If pos...

Mind Your Tone

We tend to respond to people using the same tone they use to speak to us.

If you need to have an emotionally charged conversation, speak in a way that's calm and collected. And if a discussion begins to escalate, focus on softening your tone or lowering your voice; others are likely to mimic you.

Mute

Sharing your opinion when others are aggravated can be counterproductive. If things get emotional, and you can’t leave, you may need to stop talking and let them express their feelings.

Breathe deeply and remember that moods are temporary. And that their words at this point may be extreme or exaggerated; resist the urge to respond in kind. Often, once they let everything out, they'll calm down. 

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Take Up Knitting

Keeping your hands busy has been found by research to help keep the mind off of worries. Verbal distractions, such as counting out loud, had no benefit.

Keeping your hands and mind bus...

Write Down Your Worries

Getting your emotions down on paper can decrease anxieties, as you reassess them while writing. 

Engage In Forest Therapy

Spending time within a forest setting can reduce psychological stress, depressive symptoms, and hostility, while at the same time improving sleep, and increasing both vigor and a feeling of liveliness

20 minutes of walking in the woods and listening to the sounds of nature alter cerebral blood flow in a manner that indicated a state of relaxation and reduced stress hormone levels.

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The 'tiny habits' method

You can hack your motivation and make changes that last by using the Tiny Habits method.

It works by breaking down big changes into tiny actions, find where they fit naturally into your li...

Repetition and habits

Habits can form very quickly. For instance, give someone a new phone, and their emotional response to using the device will wire in a habit very quickly. There is no need for repetition.

New habits then form as long as people have a strong positive emotion connected to the new behavior.

Designing for habit formation

Emotions create habits, not repetition. If you are designing a new habit, you are really designing for emotions.

Intentionally create feelings of success to wire in the habits that you actually want in your life.

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