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Comparisons often lead people to think that they can just deal with there problems on their own. Rather than reach out for help and support, people are often left feeling that their issues aren't serious enough to warrant attention.
A person who is experiencing symptoms of depression, for example, might not seek out help because they think that they don’t have any “reason” to feel depressed, especially when they compare their life and experiences to other people who seem to have it worse.
In such cases, comparisons can lead to avoiding your problems rather than finding ways to address them. Even if you feel like your problems "aren't that bad," you still deserve support and help.
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The reality that some defree of comparisons iss inevitable. people are simply wired to notice what other people are experiencing adn then consider how it compares to their own sitation. And in some cases, it can actually have a positive effect, including:
The next time you are tempted to compare feelings to someone else's, take a step back. Will it be helpful? Or are you using it as a way to dismiss your emotions? Instead of comparing:
Each individual has different resources and experiences that play a role in how they are affected by different emotions. just as not all people feel joy the same way, not everyone fee;s pain in the same way.
there is not a hierachry of emotion that says that one person's feelings ar...
When you are coping with something difficult in your life, it isn't uncommon for someone else to say " it could be worse."
Comparing your own pain and other emotions to others is common, but that does not mean that is always helpful
In other cases, comparisons can st...
The focus of comparing your emotions is often to minimize ether what you are feeling or what they are feeling. some examples include:
Even if someone else's sitation is objectively "worse" than yours, it doesn't mean that you are not experiencing very real, very valid emotions.
You are allowed to feel upset when someone hurts you or disappointed when something doesn't work out the way that you wanted it to.
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They might convince themselves their depression isn’t that bad:
Sometimes, life can get so challenging that we isolate ourselves. You should find a source of emotional support during those times.
Seek out people who lift you up, rather than pull you down.
Leaders who use this lens think their leadership rose out of the achievement of a particular position. They often feel protective and responsible for their teams.
They describe themselves as having paternalistic leadership styles, marked by the support, control, and guidan...
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