Josh Billings

“Half of the troubles of this life can be traced to saying yes too quickly and not saying no soon enough.”

JOSH BILLINGS

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@lailaim

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Communication

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The Awkward Pause

Use awkward pauses as a tool to say no. When a request comes to you (this works only in person), just pause for a moment. Count to three before delivering your verdict.

Using E-mail Bouncebacks

Using email bouncebacks is the most socially acceptable “no” there is. It doesn't mean you're telling them that you don't want to respond to them. It only states that you can't reply for a certain period of time. 

Saying "No" With Humor

Saying "no" with humor will lessen the awkwardness and will lighten up the atmosphere.

This is a particularly good way to navigate a request you would like to support somewhat but cannot throw your full weight behind. I particularly like this construct because it also expresses a respect for the other person's ability to choose, as well as your own. It reminds both parties of the choices they have.

E-mail is also a good way to start practicing saying "no but" because it gives you the chance to draft and redraft your "no" to make it as graceful as possible. Plus, many people find that the distance of e-mail reduces the fear of awkwardness.

“Let me check my calendar and get back to you”

It gives you the time to pause and reflect and ultimately reply that if you are or are not available. It enables you to take back control of your own decisions rather than be rushed into a “yes” when you are asked.

Warren Buffett

"The difference between successful people and really successful people is that really successful people say no to almost everything."

“Yes. What should I deprioritize?”

Saying no to a senior leader at work is almost unthinkable, even laughable, for many people. However, when saying yes is going to compromise your ability to make the highest level of contribution to your work, it is also your obligation. In this case it is not only reasonable to say no, it is essential. One effective way to do that is to remind your superiors what you would be neglecting if you said yes and force them to grapple with the trade-off.

<p>"<i>Saying no is its own le...

"Saying no is its own leadership capability. It is not just a peripheral skill. As with any ability, we start with limited experience."

It is tempting to think that our help is uniquely invaluable, but often people requesting something don't really care if we're the ones who help them- as long as they get the help.

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RELATED IDEAS

The people pleaser

There's a high price for continually saying yes to the thing you just don't want to do.

When your top priority is to be liked all the time, you suppress and repress who you are. The good news is that it is a habit you can change.

How To Say No, For The People Pleaser Who Always Says Yes

npr.org

What is Essentialism?
  1. Essentialism is a form of discipline, described by author Greg McKeown.
  2. Essentialism is the art of discerning between external noise and internal voice.
  3. It’s not a task and time management tactical list. It’s more than that.
  4. It’s a mindset - a way of life.

The Art Of Essentialism

forbes.com

  • The Indirect “No."Say no without feeling uncomfortable by explaining the reasons why you can't.
  • The “Let me get back to you.”Buy yourself time to think if you could do it and come up of a way to say no.
  • The Conditional “Yes.”With this conditional yes, we force people to prioritize. It shows that you have other things on your plate.
  • The Direct “No.”When you have mastered saying no, you stop giving excuses and start to say no firmly. Practice makes perfect.

The Art Of Saying No: 4 Ways To Reclaim Your Time - Darius Foroux

dariusforoux.com

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