A manipulator doesn’t believe there are any win-win situations. If someone else wins, that means they lose, and they have no intention of losing.”

DONALD MILLER

@ishank

🌻

Self Improvement

MORE IDEAS FROM THE ARTICLE

Manipulators do most of the manipulation unconsciously, as a survival mechanism.

Manipulation stems as a defense mechanism of an unwillingly twisted mind and these people need professional help. While you don’t have to judge these people, you should always try to keep a safe distance until they begin to truly trust you and drop the act.

Treats life as a contest in which they set the rules and frame the scoreboard in order to always win. He/she keeps tabs on owed favors and call them in when he/she wants to control you.

Views the world through a black and white prism of right and wrong. They set the standards based on their decisions, lord them over others as having superior judgment to maintain authority and power and refuse to admit any mistakes.

Leads people to believe they have something better to offer than others. They often promise a vision which seems too good to be true and can’t deliver it.

Makes people suffer the consequences for perceived insubordination. They fear being perceived as vulnerable, so they surround themselves with weaker people and project strength and dominance while praising submissive loyalty.

THey overdramatize and perpetuate their victimhood in order to gain sympathy and attention, often choosing an oppressor who may or may not be at fault for their perceived problems. They use guilt to gain and maintain control over people.

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RELATED IDEAS

  • They pretend to be innocent, ignorant, or confused when they did something awful. This tactic is to make you question your judgment.
  • They don't give a straight answer to a straight question, but evade the question or change the subject when cornered.
  • They lie by omission or distortion by deliberately being vague.
  • They may either respond with charm and flattery, of will suddenly be angry.
  • They'll play the victim and make themselves out to be the one in distress.
  • They rationalize by giving a plausible excuse for engaging in inappropriate behavior, or they will downplay their behavior.
  • Covert aggressives don't feel bad, but they know you do. They will send you on a guilt trip so you will lighten your accusations.

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IDEAS

“Manipulation is an emotionally unhealthy psychological strategy used by people who are incapable of asking for what they want and need in a direct way. People who are trying to manipulate others are trying to control others.”
Psychological Manipulation And Social Influence
  • Psychological manipulation is the exercise of undue influence through mental distortion and emotional exploitation, with the intention to seize power, control, benefits, and privileges at the victim’s expense. 
  • Healthy social influence occurs between most people, and is part of the give and take of constructive relationships.

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