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Overthinking goes into overdrive when we keep revisiting decisions we make, refusing to close the door on a call that has been made. Believe that youâve done your due diligence, and revisit something youâve already decided only when youâre presented with new information.
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Constantly ruminating and going over scenarios and possibilities often disguises itself as problem solving. It feels like youâre doing something good and useful. But youâre not, youâre just spinning in a circle. Recognize when youâre overthinking something, donât act like itâs problem solving, and press fast-forward.
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This is a formula, a ratio, for how you should calculate how you value yourself, based on 90 percent self-worth, 10 percent assigned worth. Ninety percent should come from your self-acceptance and self-appreciation, and just 10 percent from that occasional sliver of external validation we all need.
Overthinkers distort the formula, even reversing it by acting like 90 percent of their worth comes from what others think or say. So they worry, which takes the form of--you guessed it--overthinking.
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Overthinkers read too much into things. Why? Theyâre assuming something bad lies underneath, something like a bad perception, someone wishing them ill, or an unfavorable outcome. When you catch yourself doing this, switch your assumption to what you're reading into was well-intended, or at least neutral. The vast majority of the time, it really is, so why not act like it?
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News flash: You canât read the future, you canât read minds, and you canât know everything. So donât try. Thinking harder doesnât activate the crystal ball.
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When we donât know something, we tend to fill in the blanks, often with garbage assumptions. Why? Many of us would rather be unhappy than uncertain. Garbage assumptions can take many forms, all infusing themselves into the inner monologue of the overthinker.
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Overthinkers keep asking themselves âwhat if,â which is an impossible question to answer. If you catch yourself asking âwhat if,â quickly switch it to âweâll see,â which is a way of moving past analysis paralysis to acceptance.
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By this I mean stop spending so much time in your head. Get outside it and switch gears to connect with what's going on around you so you can take joy in it. It can be dark and foreboding inside that head of yours, no?
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Overthinking also comes from overworrying about the worse-case scenario, which of course no one wants to experience. But ask yourself, âWhat is the probability the undesirable outcome will actually occur?â Odds are, not very high.
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Related to the above, this means stop taking small details and turning them into questionable conclusions. Stop making a mountain out of a molehill. Unlike at the mall, this kind of escalator lifts nobody up.
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We often feel the need to overthink because we simply fear being wrong. It might make sense to overthink things if youâre planning to jump your motorbike over the Grand Canyon or to go swimming with a great white shark. As for overthinking the decision you made in that meeting yesterday? Not so much.
Ask yourself in such moments what the realistic cost of being wrong is. When you can lower the stakes, you raise your ability to get mentally unstuck.
So donât overthink it. Take the inspiration here and run with it. Without looking back.
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IDEAS CURATED BY
CURATOR'S NOTE
Getting rid of overthinking isn't easy. Thanks to these outstanding ideas by Scott Mautz that make solutions simple for us.
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Learn more about personaldevelopment with this collection
How to manage anxiety and self-doubt
Strategies for setting realistic goals
The importance of self-compassion and self-care
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