Lack of Communication: How It Affects Us and Ways to Improve It

• passive listening instead of active listening
• shutting down
• letting things bottle up inside until you explode in anger or sadness
• yelling or screaming
• becoming physically or verbally abusive
• dismissing other people’s points of view
• demonstrating passive-aggressive behavior
• not being clear about expectations, needs, or wants
• giving the silent treatment
• interrupting

Poor or insufficient communication doesn’t have to be a dealbreaker, as long as both people are committed to learning and practicing better communication skills.

It’s a two-way street, and repairing communication works best when all people involved share the responsibility of making it work.

By practicing, giving feedback, and seeking out help, anyone’s communication skills can improve.

Use ‘I’ statements

Using “I” statements helps you put your feelings into words and explain how you’re specifically affected by another person’s behavior. Because you’re intentionally focusing on yourself, you aren’t attributing negative actions or placing blame on the other person.

In any relationship, setting clear personal boundaries is very important so that there’s no misunderstanding about when those lines are crossed or what topics are off-limits.

If boundaries aren’t clearly communicated, people may be unaware that they’ve gone too far.

Here’s an example

“Mom, I don’t like it when you shout at me over the phone. I’m not OK with shouting, and I don’t want to have our future conversations include shouting.”

This person is clearly communicating a boundary — that they’re not OK with yelling and stating their expectations for future conversations.

There are certain times, especially during a heated discussion, that it might be necessary to take a break so that you can calm down, collect your thoughts, and return to the discussion with a clearer mindset. Even a brief pause can help prevent a further communication breakdown.