13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do - Deepstash
13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do

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13 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do

by Amy Morin

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1. Mentally Strong People Don’t Feel the World Owes Them Anything

No matter how intelligent you are or what life has thrown at you, there is no way to become more deserving of success than anyone else.

If a person loses their business and feels indebted, they’re inviting more frustration and anger into their life. Mentally strong people can shift their focus away from their debt. Hence, they can help people in need. Mentally strong people keep themselves busy doing good deeds.

If you follow this guidance, you can stop wasting time, stop feeling like you are owed something and stop resenting others’ success.

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2. Mentally Strong People Don’t Waste Time Feeling Sorry for Themselves

By far, the most harmful drug is self-pity. It is addictive, provides only temporary pleasure, and disconnects people from reality.

No one is immune to hard times. However, it is how you react to these situations that is important. Mentally strong individuals do not spend precious time pitying themselves. They replace self-pity with gratitude. 

Amy Morin provides an example of an American long-distance runner, Marla Runyan. She ran the New York Marathon in a little over two hours. Marla also has a master’s degree in education and has written a book.

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3. Mentally Strong People Don’t Resent Other People’s Success

When you see a colleague receive a promotion, feelings of envy may come to the surface. While this may be normal, feeling jealous of others’ success eventually leads to resentment, which can distract you from your path.

Instead, overcome your envy of other people’s success and learn how to use their success to your benefit. 

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4. Mentally Strong People Don’t Give Away Their Power

When you allow your boss to make you feel a certain way, you give them power over how you think, feel, or even behave. No one should have power over your feelings. You should change your daily vocabulary to recognize that the choices you make are yours.

Avoid phrases like “He made me mad,” or “I have to work late today.” One of the biggest factors in taking control of your feelings is forgiveness. When you hold on to anger and resentment, you allow others to limit your ability and disrupt your life. Therefore, it’s important to forgive others for their wrongdoings and focus back on yourself.

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5. Mentally Strong People Don’t Focus on Things Beyond Their Control

When you feel your life is out of control, take out a piece of paper, and draw a horizontal line through the middle. In the top section, write, “What I can’t control.” In the bottom section, write, “What I can control.” When populating the top section, remember you can’t control what has happened. However, you can control what you focus on, what things mean, and how you behave. After you’ve listed the things you can and can’t control, rip off the top section.

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Many people feel haunted by their past and the legacy of their families. However, it’s possible to find constructive ways to move forward despite one’s origins.

Take activist and social worker Wynona Ward. Born in a small village in Vermont, she grew up with a sexually and physically abusive father. Ward didn’t tell anyone about this abuse but worked hard to get ahead in school and escape her hometown. She got married at 17-year-old and began working as a truck driver with her husband. But while she’d worked hard to free herself, others in her family struggled to do so.

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Pleasing everyone can negatively impact mental strength. Suppose you worry too much about pleasing others. In that case, you should learn to make choices that align with your values and act accordingly, even if that means disappointing or upsetting others. When you accept you won’t please everyone, you become stronger and build courage when you anticipate displeasing others.

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8. Mentally Strong People Don’t Repeat The Same Mistakes

Mentally strong people don’t just pick themselves up and get back on their feet. Before that, they take a moment to find out why they fell off.

When you own and study your mistakes, you’re less likely to slide back into your old ways. Experience less resistance to owning and studying a mistake you’ve made by imagining it was performed by someone else. Identify the factors that led to the mistake: thoughts, behaviors, and external factors. Then, write an alternative action for the next time those thoughts, behaviors, and external factors arise.

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9. Mentally Strong People Don’t Shy Away from Change

It’s not as if some people have more willpower than others. It’s just that some people are willing to adapt while others aren’t.

Judge Greg Mathis is an excellent example of a mentally strong person. Arrested several times as a teenager, he promised his dying mother he would change. After being released from jail on probation, he started working at McDonald’s and eventually got accepted to Eastern Michigan University, and later, law school. However, due to his record as a criminal, he was barred from working as a lawyer.

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10. Mentally Strong People Don’t Fear Taking Calculated Risks

Don’t be too afraid about what you’re going to do. Every moment of your life is an experiment. The more you experiment, the better.

Many people fear taking risks. You must consider life decisions and assess risks carefully. Therefore, it’s essential to learn how to minimize risks and determine which risks are worth the benefits. Calculate risks by asking yourself: “What are the potential costs?”, “What are the potential benefits?”, “How will this affect my goals?”, “What are the alternatives?”, “What is the best thing and the worst thing that can happen?”, ...

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11. Mentally Strong People Don’t Give up After Their First Failure

Many people experience significant fear of failure. Many will avoid failure at all costs, so they fear taking risks. However, almost every success story begins with a long road of failure and perseverance. Simply put, those who succeed view their failures as stepping stones for improvement. Failure is simply a part of becoming a success and is a sign you are being challenged.

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12. Mentally Strong People Don’t Fear Alone Time

You are likely surrounded by noise most days. Many seek to maintain those noise levels by turning on the television. They aim to fill those uncomfortable silences, but when you fill your life with noise, you miss a powerful opportunity.

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13. Mentally Strong People Don’t Expect Immediate Results

A 1972 study looked at whether people succeeded in their New Year’s resolutions. They found that 25 percent of participants had abandoned their resolutions after 15 weeks. In a similar 1989 study, that number had gone down to only one week.

The underlying issue is that our goals and expectations are unrealistic.

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