Matthew Clark's Key Ideas from Conversational Intelligence
by Judith E. Glaser

Approach conversations with genuine curiosity about the other's perspective, empathy for their experiences, and an openness to wherever the interaction leads organically.

Avoid preconceived notions or forcing a predetermined agenda. Let go of limiting assumptions. See each conversation as a discovery process.

Ask thoughtful, engaging questions that organically reveal motivations, elicit illuminating stories, draw out creative insights, and stimulate both parties' thinking.

Avoid assumptions. Let answers determine the direction to guide discussion and inspiration.

• Listen deeply not just with your ears but all your senses, to fully understand context, emotion, and meaning below the surface.
• Reflect back your understanding of insights shared to show you truly hear the person. Receive generously.

Express your own ideas concisely, vividly, and with compelling analogies and examples that crystallize understanding rather than overwhelming with pure data and verbosity.

Craft your words and messages to resonate at a core human level.

Establish shared understanding by synthesizing key facts, diverse ideas, and emotional sentiments expressed from both sides into collective meaning.

Leave space for co-creating unified understanding through two-way dialogue. 

Give space for people to think out loud, elaborate, and arrive at their own insights and breakthroughs through your receptive, non-judgmental presence.

Guide discovery through questions rather than forcing pre-determined conclusions.

• Take time to clarify shared purpose and mutually beneficial desired outcomes upfront to provide overall direction.
• But also stay open to new value and possibilities that may emerge through the organic flow of your interactions and exchanges.