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A newborn starts speaking after 12-18 months on average. And after that, their vocabulary keeps growing because they keep talking and talking.
Their curiosity makes them explore the world and learn new things. But then, it comes a time when kids learn that words have consequences. And they start to shut up and think before speaking.
Saying what’s on your mind should be simple. It is simple. But if we think about the consequences, we start fearing saying things out loud.
Meeting new people is fun. It should be fun if you don’t have problems interacting with them. But if you are afraid your stories won’t make them empathize or lack the confidence to believe your ideas are worth sharing, you will hate it.
I used to refuse to meet people because I didn’t know them and was afraid to speak with them. But after working on my confidence, I don’t struggle anymore because I don’t care.
I don’t need to be friends with someone who dislikes my humor and stories. I am confident I will find other people genuinely interested in my personality and story - people who enjoy their time around me. Everyone else can do whatever they want. They won’t change who I am.
So, in this issue, you will solve this problem. You will learn 4 ways to master the art of confidence and never fear attention anymore.
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I’ve already spoiled you the key to becoming more confident. But I will repeat myself because I want to be transparent.
Stop caring too much – that’s it.
When you care too much, you are exposed. You put yourself in a disadvantageous position. And people will perceive you as needy, condescending, and weak. So they will quickly lose interest in you, and you will hardly raise their interest again.
But if you keep your higher or neutral position, three things could happen:
Stop caring, and they will come to you – the concept is simple. But it’s easier said than done.
How can you stop caring? How can you learn to stay with people without feeling weird?
Here are four ways to slowly build confidence that you can practice starting today. Also, remember that, in these cases, only one thing works:
“Fake it until you make it.”
Echoing what your interlocutor says is the simplest technique to build confidence. It gives you time to catch up when you feel nervous. And it helps you connect with people by building likeability, trust, and support.
Overdoing it is the only problem of the echo technique. And if you echo your interlocutor too much:
So, use it to build trust with your interlocutor. But don’t do it too much.
Building confidence is a vast topic. But how can you improve on specific subjects like speaking in public or talking to girls or guys you like?
You can use the Gradual Exposure Therapy.
Peer pressure will skyrocket every time you will do something you have never done before. And you may make mistakes.
When people make mistakes, they often close up and stop trying. But that’s a lost opportunity. You could use those moments for self-irony.
If you expose yourself to this kind of irony, people will feel comfortable joking and bantering with you. You will create a safe space for them to interact with you. And you will build relationships faster.
Here are two ideas I used in the past:
Vulnerability will always be one of your greatest strengths. And if you learn to laugh about your weaknesses and insecurities, people will find you more likable.
Body language talks more than we wish. Good communicators have learned to recognize its tellings without actively seeking clues.
Some of them don’t even know they are using it. It is more of an instinct to them. But, of course, communication skills never come naturally. It is all about training and experiencing new situations. So, you can improve your body language skills by practicing.
We will further discuss this ability in the next issue of the series. But for now, here are three simple suggestions you could start using.
Confidence is challenging. So, use this 30-day multi-tracker to build your confidence and become the most confident person in the room. Start with the echo technique and the gradual exposure therapy. And when you fail, make fun of your mistake. Try to care less about the consequences.
Passionate about self-improvement, personal growth, finance, and creativity. I love to inspire people to become the better version of themselves. Author @ www.cosmopolitanmindset.com
Elevate your self-belief with the art of confidence. Learn to reign supreme in every aspect of life and unleash your full potential now!
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