The Parentified Child in Adulthood

Parentification can involve a range of behaviours, from the overt—making children engage in physical tasks that typically fall to adults in the family, including tasks such as cooking and cleaning[1], caring for siblings or caring for the parent themselves, to the subtler—confiding in a child in a manner that is not age-appropriate, seeking emotional support from a child, expecting tasks of a child beyond their developmental capacity, seeking advice from children, using them as mediators or buffers, and involving them in family conflicts.

The impact of parentification on children can be vast. Parentified children may experience a range of difficulties in adulthood, including; enmeshed roles within the family, difficulties with establishing boundaries , a pervasive need to please other people, anxiety , perfectionism , difficulties forming and maintaining intimate or platonic relationships, missed developmental milestones, grief , and passive styles of communication.