Inner Child Wounds

To us it may have appeared normal when in all reality we have experienced some toxic or restrictive circumstances.

The inner child never dies but simply transforms as part of our guide system.

We are conditioned by the thoughts , emotions and actions or lack there of from our childhood .

Sometimes when we are triggered, we allow those feelings or preconceived notions to take the wheel.

While we think we are in control, 4-year-old us is taking us through a crash course on repressed emotions and their impact on our psyche.

Abandonment & neglect in any form. Whether it be physical, emotional, or mental abandonment. Anytime you’ve felt left without or come up short when it comes to love, understanding, and support.

Abuse: Physical, emotional, or sexual abuse can place permanent scars on your psyche. Leaving one to feel embarrassed or disgusted with others and themselves.

Traumatic and dysfunctional family patterns or cycles: when there is a constant conflict whatever the reason can be a rather unsafe environment for an adolescent.

• People-pleasing which is one I struggled with often. It not only shows ignorance of our self-worth but that we are not fully respecting ourselves.
• Having a hard time setting boundaries. Mainly with those you love. Having a fear of telling the people you’re close to no or allowing others to show little to no respect for you and your limits.
• Struggling with your self esteem and feeling like you don’t deserve the good things in life . Have a perspective that you will always get the short end of the stick.

• Issues with detachment. When you’re too attached it makes room for suffering. We hold to what we don’t want to lose and it makes it more difficult to form a healthy, trusting relationship with others.
• Self-sabotaging tendencies. At times we can unconsciously create situations and mental scenarios that back up our negative beliefs about ourselves

The good news is that even though these wounds run deep, they can be healed with work, time and patience.

I struggled for a long time finding the root of my wounds. When I looked at my childhood objectively rather than with adoration and rose-colored glasses, I noticed that a lot of my wounds came from things I perceived in my childhood during my most impressionable years.

Not only personal obstacles and afflictions but things perceived in the environment. Toxicity and trauma being passed down can be from outside sources and embedded in our memories unbeknownst to us.

These are a few ways I learned to work with and cope with my inner child wounds :

1. Acknowledge the wounds: It’s important to figure out my first step is recognizing the pain and its potential source.
2. Reparenting yourself and learning to show yourself more compassion: Treat your inner child in the way you needed during your childhood. Provide him or her with what you lack.
3. Inner child work healing work: There are many ways including visualization, journaling, and meditation that can help you gain a connection with your inner child and understand the needs that need to be met.

4. Therapy or counseling: A therapist or other licensed professional can help by providing you with guidance and offering support in your time of need. They help with unpacking the pains from your past and helping you develop healthy coping mechanisms for your wounds.

Healing your inner child’s wounds is not only beneficial to you in the present but also to the future versions of yourself. By becoming aware of these past wounds, we can grow a stronger sense of self-awareness.