Being young is being curious. And most people become cynical and overly critical towards life as they grow older, and only a select few retain the wonder, innocence and joy of a child.
An adult's life consists of optimizing life using knowledge, mental models and practical shortcuts, a race towards better efficiency in everything. We stop asking the right questions, like the most common question a child asks: Why?

Becoming Young

Our inner critic is usually formed in a system based on right and wrong answers and outperforming others on structured tasks. Listening to our inner critic will rarely improve our creative work - it may actually result in conformative work.
We need to turn this inner-critic into an inner-coach and drive our personal growth.

Our Inner Critic

We do not need to suppress or kill our inner critic, but only need to re-educate it, but only need to deploy three simple ways to make space for the inner child:
<ol>
<li>Get more playful in our creative endeavours.</li>
<li>Skip doing something adults do in favour of doing something that kids love to do, like drawing, writing poems and playing in the pool.</li>
<li>Practice constructive questioning by asking why to the things we (and others) take for granted.</li>
</ol>

Re-educating Our Inner Critic

“It takes a very long time to become young,” Pablo Picasso once said. Adults miss the innocent curiosity of their youth; artists strive to reclaim their lost childlike creativity. The creative process often feels like a constant battle between an inner child and an inner critic. Can this creative battle turn into creative balance?<figure><img width="665" height="444" src="https://nesslabs.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/inner-child-burning-man-structure.jpg" alt="Burning Man Art - Inner Child versus Inner Critic" srcset="https://nesslabs.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/inner-child-burning-man-structure.jpg 910w, https://nesslabs.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/inner-child-burning-man-structure-300x200.jpg 300w, https://nesslabs.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/07/inner-child-burning-man-structure-768x512.jpg 768w"><figcaption dir="ltr">Inner Child structure at Burning Man (credit: <a href="https://www.instagram.com/alexandermilov" rel="noreferrer noopener" dir="ltr">Alexander Milov</a>)</figcaption></figure><h2>Becoming young</h2>Being young is being curious: on average, <a href="https://nesslabs.com/science-of-curiosity" dir="ltr">children ask 107 questions per hour</a>. But, as we grow older, we start accumulating factual knowledge, practical shortcuts, and <a href="https://nesslabs.com/mental-models" dir="ltr">mental models</a> to make decisions faster. In a society focused on speed as a measure of performance, we look for the quickest path to achieve our goals. We prioritise so much knowing how and how fast we can get to a desired outcome, we forget to stop and ask why during the journey.And when we do ask ourselves questions, they are often fueled by self-doubt. Is my work good enough? What will people think? Our inner critic was educated by a learning system based on finding the correct answer and outperforming others on structured tasks. Instead of resulting in better creative work, listening to our inner critic may result in conformative work.While the inner child is traditionally used in psychology to describe an unconscious archetype pointing to unresolved childhood experiences, it can be embraced to better balance our creativity. “Has your adult self spent time with your inner child today?” asks psychologist Stephen Diamond in his book Psychotherapy for the Soul.<h2>Re-educating the inner critic</h2>We often talk about <a href="https://nesslabs.com/writing-habit" dir="ltr">killing our inner critic</a>. But connecting to the child within and unlocking your childlike creativity is not about silencing the inner critic. Instead, it’s about reprogramming the way the inner critic interacts with the inner child: unlearning the self-doubt, the meaningless competition, and the <a href="https://nesslabs.com/fear-of-failure" dir="ltr">fear of failure</a>.As with many negative emotional experiences, it is often more useful to accept the voice within so we can better understand it. Turning self-criticism into self-reflection can fuel your creativity by giving you an opportunity to dig deeper into your own psyche, and to face your thoughts and emotions in a healthy way. Instead of killing the inner critic, we kill it with kindness.So, how do you go about it? Positive self-talk is a simple way to turn self-criticism into self-reflection. <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6628429/" dir="ltr">Research</a> suggests that positive self-talk helps athletes improve both their performance and their mental state, and a <a href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/26167788/" dir="ltr">meta-analysis</a> of 32 studies on self-talk corroborates these findings.There are simple ways to make space for positive self-talk.<UL><LI>Build your own PaaP. Integrate <a href="https://nesslabs.com/playfulness-as-a-practice" dir="ltr">playfulness as a practice</a> in your creative work. Talk yourself into trying new things, forget about the goal, and surround yourself with playful people.</LI><LI>Embrace JOMO. It’s okay to skip on an adult gathering to spend time at home with your inner child. Do you feel like drawing, writing poems, or learning how to 3D print instead of grabbing drinks with colleagues? Go ahead. Experience the <a href="https://nesslabs.com/jomo" dir="ltr">joy of missing out</a>.</LI><LI>Ask why. Don’t let perceived knowledge deter you from asking questions. Keep on asking why like a child would. Train your inner critic to turn self-doubt into constructive questions that encourage exploration.</LI></UL>Over time, the inner critic becomes your inner coach. Instead of a paralysing battle impeding your creative process, it drives your <a href="https://nesslabs.com/growth-mindset" dir="ltr">personal growth</a>. “What will people think?” becomes “Who could give me constructive feedback?”; “How can I create based on this trend?” turns into “How can I create based on my curiosity?”; instead of asking “Does it feel good enough?” based on external standards we ask “Does it feel good?” based on our sense of play and curiosity.“It’s never too late to have a happy childhood,” wrote Tom Robbins. <a href="https://nesslabs.com/time-anxiety" dir="ltr">It’s never too late</a> indeed. Kill your inner critic with kindness so it turns into your inner coach, and embrace the playfulness and curiosity of your inner child to increase your creativity. Your inner monologues will be much more enjoyable, which will reflect in your life and work.<img alt="🧠" src="https://s.w.org/images/core/emoji/13.0.0/svg/1f9e0.svg" width="17" height="17"> As a knowledge worker, your brain is your most important tool. Join 17,092 readers and subscribe to Maker Mind, a weekly newsletter with neuroscience-based insights on decision making, continuous learning, thinking, creativity, and productivity. One email a week, no spam, ever. <a href="https://nesslabs.com/privacy" dir="ltr">Privacy policy</a>.As a welcome gift, you will receive The Beginner's Guide to Mindframing (22 pages), 30 Mental Models to Add to Your Thinking Toolbox (6 pages), and a printable Plus Minus Next journal template.

“It takes a very long time to become young,” said Pablo Picasso. The creative process often feels like a constant battle between an inner child and an inner critic. Can this creative battle turn into creative balance?

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“It takes a very long time to become young,” Pablo Picasso once said. Adults miss the innocent curiosity of their youth; artists strive to reclaim their lost childlike creativity. The creative process often feels like a constant battle between an inner child and an inner critic. Can this creative battle turn into creative balance?

Being young is being curious: on average, <a dir="ltr" href="https://nesslabs.com/science-of-curiosity">children ask 107 questions per hour </a>. But, as we grow older, we start accumulating factual knowledge, practical shortcuts, and <a dir="ltr" href="https://nesslabs.com/mental-models">mental models </a>to make decisions faster. In a society focused on speed as a measure of performance, we look for the quickest path to achieve our goals. We prioritise so much knowing how and how fast we can get to a desired outcome, we forget to stop and ask why during the journey.

And when we do ask ourselves questions, they are often fueled by self-doubt. Is my work good enough? What will people think? Our inner critic was educated by a learning system based on finding the correct answer and outperforming others on structured tasks. Instead of resulting in better creative work, listening to our inner critic may result in conformative work.

While the inner child is traditionally used in psychology to describe an unconscious archetype pointing to unresolved childhood experiences, it can be embraced to better balance our creativity. “Has your adult self spent time with your inner child today?” asks psychologist Stephen Diamond in his book Psychotherapy for the Soul.

We often talk about <a dir="ltr" href="https://nesslabs.com/writing-habit">killing our inner critic </a>. But connecting to the child within and unlocking your childlike creativity is not about silencing the inner critic. Instead, it’s about reprogramming the way the inner critic interacts with the inner child: unlearning the self-doubt, the meaningless competition, and the <a dir="ltr" href="https://nesslabs.com/fear-of-failure">fear of failure </a>.

As with many negative emotional experiences, it is often more useful to accept the voice within so we can better understand it. Turning self-criticism into self-reflection can fuel your creativity by giving you an opportunity to dig deeper into your own psyche, and to face your thoughts and emotions in a healthy way. Instead of killing the inner critic, we kill it with kindness.

So, how do you go about it? Positive self-talk is a simple way to turn self-criticism into self-reflection. <a dir="ltr" href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6628429/">Research </a>suggests that positive self-talk helps athletes improve both their performance and their mental state, and a <a dir="ltr" href="https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/26167788/">meta-analysis </a>of 32 studies on self-talk corroborates these findings.

There are simple ways to make space for positive self-talk.

<ul><li>Build your own PaaP. Integrate <a dir="ltr" href="https://nesslabs.com/playfulness-as-a-practice">playfulness as a practice </a>in your creative work. Talk yourself into trying new things, forget about the goal, and surround yourself with playful people. </li><li>Embrace JOMO. It’s okay to skip on an adult gathering to spend time at home with your inner child. Do you feel like drawing, writing poems, or learning how to 3D print instead of grabbing drinks with colleagues? Go ahead. Experience the <a dir="ltr" href="https://nesslabs.com/jomo">joy of missing out </a>. </li><li>Ask why. Don’t let perceived knowledge deter you from asking questions. Keep on asking why like a child would. Train your inner critic to turn self-doubt into constructive questions that encourage exploration. </li> </ul>

Over time, the inner critic becomes your inner coach. Instead of a paralysing battle impeding your creative process, it drives your <a dir="ltr" href="https://nesslabs.com/growth-mindset">personal growth </a>. “What will people think?” becomes “Who could give me constructive feedback?”; “How can I create based on this trend?” turns into “How can I create based on my curiosity?”; instead of asking “Does it feel good enough?” based on external standards we ask “Does it feel good?” based on our sense of play and curiosity.

“It’s never too late to have a happy childhood,” wrote Tom Robbins. <a dir="ltr" href="https://nesslabs.com/time-anxiety">It’s never too late </a>indeed. Kill your inner critic with kindness so it turns into your inner coach, and embrace the playfulness and curiosity of your inner child to increase your creativity. Your inner monologues will be much more enjoyable, which will reflect in your life and work.

As a knowledge worker, your brain is your most important tool. Join 17,092 readers and subscribe to Maker Mind, a weekly newsletter with neuroscience-based insights on decision making, continuous learning, thinking, creativity, and productivity.

One email a week, no spam, ever. <a dir="ltr" href="https://nesslabs.com/privacy">Privacy policy </a>.

As a welcome gift, you will receive The Beginner's Guide to Mindframing (22 pages), 30 Mental Models to Add to Your Thinking Toolbox (6 pages), and a printable Plus Minus Next journal template.

Inner child and inner critic: a battle for creativity

Becoming Young

Our Inner Critic

Re-educating Our Inner Critic

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