Love Life - Deepstash
Love Life

Book Panda Notes's Key Ideas from Love Life
by Matthew Hussey

Ideas, facts & insights covering these topics:

11 ideas

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4 Levels Of Importance

4 Levels Of Importance

Level 1: Adļ»æmiration šŸ¤©

This level is just a mind trick and should not be given too much importance.

Level 2: Mutual Attraction ā¤ļø

It feels good, but just because there is mutual attraction does not mean our intentions will align.

Level 3: Commitment šŸ”

Commitment can be compared to two people discovering a plot of land together that seems to have potential. If one does not say yes, they lose all value attributed to them.

Level 4: Compatibility šŸ‘«

Who is great at managing our freakouts? Whose freakouts are we great at managing? Can even our differences be a source of pleasure?

97

908 reads

Why Do People Go Cold? What Changes?

Why Do People Go Cold? What Changes?

Not sure why people are distant? Don't blame yourself. Honesty is hard and sometimes overwhelming.

Noticed someone distancing themselves? Maybe they're feeling too much pressure too soon.

Possible Reasons for Coldness:

  1. Fear of vulnerability
  2. Feeling rushed or pressured
  3. Need for independence

Understanding these reasons can help you communicate better and strengthen relationships. šŸ˜Š

Example: Imagine someone with no experience being asked to be the CEO starting tomorrow. šŸ˜¬

102

771 reads

MATTHEW HUSSEY

Situationships are opposite of love at first sight, you get nudged over and over as if you've joined a cult of two.

MATTHEW HUSSEY

92

792 reads

Beware of Avoiders šŸš«

Beware of Avoiders šŸš«

  • They go out of their way to avoid sharing a single word that leads to a true sense of intimacy.
  • They are more dangerous than liars because they depend on our unwillingness to face painful truths.
  • Actively ensure that you are not enabling an avoider by being one. āš ļø
  • If your relationship gets worse by speaking the truth, you are in the wrong relationship.

97

686 reads

Having Hard Conversations

Having Hard Conversations

Hard conversations arise from having a standard within ourselves, which establishes a route for our external standard.

Any painful conversation today, that saves us from the anguish of future regret, should be moved to the top of our list of priorities.

Our greatest fear should be wasting our life on someone who won't make us happy, not scaring them away.

Hard conversations tend to become even harder as time goes by. The longer our needs go unmet, the more they harden into deep resentment and anger.

109

606 reads

Signs of Intention

Signs of Intention

If someone is interested in you, they may show it through: šŸ‘€

  1. Asking questions to get to know you more
  2. Continuing the conversation even after it ends
  3. Actively making plans to spend time with you
  4. Creating a cozy atmosphere for you to feel at ease

Remember: There are plenty of people who desire the experience of having a partner but have no real intention of being a partner themselves.

100

628 reads

Love Yourself

Love Yourself

Our compassion must include ourselves.

We must understand that everyone makes mistakes, including ourselves. We are all worthy of kindness and respect, regardless of our flaws.

At birth, you were given the responsibility to take care of yourself for life. Love yourself and treat yourself with love and respect, just as you would treat someone else you were responsible for. šŸŒø

106

547 reads

Be Happy Enough

Be Happy Enough

Happy enough begins with us first radically accepting where we are now and then concluding that if nothing changes, we will actually be okay.

When we are happy enough, we can cheerfully say no to bad treatment, disrespect, or behavior that simply doesn't fit with the culture of our life.

We can also say no to someone who has different intentions, regardless of whether we have someone to replace them.

94

540 reads

Red Flags

Red Flags

1. Talking badly about multiple exes.

2. Treating people badly when they don't think you are looking.

3. Love bombing.

  • If a person is deeply into you, the last thing they would want to do is screw it up by coming on too strong.
  • If you notice unearned speed and intensity, it is not necessary to have perfect judgement of whether it is a red flag. Simply suggest a slower pace.

4. Not saying sorry.

5. Consistently not keeping promises.

6. Inconsistency in communication.

102

597 reads

Dealing With A Breakup

Dealing With A Breakup

When going through a breakup, be sure to make plans with supportive friends and share your honest feelings with them. Processing your emotions is like exercise, it takes effort but it's important not to dwell on it all day.

Take back your favorite places by creating new memories there. And remember, one positive aspect of a breakup is the opportunity to rebuild relationships with old friends that may have been lost during the relationship.

  • Cling to Supportive Friends
  • Exercise Your Emotions
  • Reclaim Your Favorite Places
  • Rebuild Lost Relationships

95

478 reads

MATTHEW HUSSEY

Never forget the fundamental, deeper truth: the love of your life can only ever be the person who chooses you for their life.

MATTHEW HUSSEY

128

5.8K reads

IDEAS CURATED BY

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CURATOR'S NOTE

How to raise your standards, find your person and live happily (no matter what)

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