How to be better at online dating, according to psychology - Deepstash

deepstash

Beta

Deepstash brings you key ideas from the most inspiring articles like this one:

Read more efficiently

Save what inspires you

Remember anything

How to be better at online dating, according to psychology

https://www.nbcnews.com/better/lifestyle/how-be-better-online-dating-according-psychology-ncna979791

nbcnews.com

How to be better at online dating, according to psychology
In some ways online dating is a different ballgame from meeting someone in real life - and in some ways it's not. (Reis points out that "online dating" is actually somewhat of a misnomer. We use the term to mean "online meeting," whether it's through a dating website or a dating app.)

4

Key Ideas

Save all ideas

Take Your Time Making Choices

Take Your Time Making Choices

Online dating greatly increases your pool of potential suitors. But the excess of choice might make you overlook good candidates.

Personal growth helps in making long-term relationships work. Don’t be quick to give up on those who are superficially flawed or aren’t an exact match to you.

219 SAVES

688 READS

VIEW

How To Portray Yourself

How To Portray Yourself

You should like your photos but they should accurately depict your physical appearance. Well perceived pictures often feature a genuine smile (one that makes your eyes start to crinkle up) and a slight head tilt.

Briefly write what’s distinctive and interesting about you and what you’re looking for. Ideally, dedicate 70% for the former and 30% for the latter.

253 SAVES

725 READS

Choosing The Right Dating Apps

Choosing The Right Dating Apps

Research shows that people tend to fall for others similar to themselves. Being honest about yourself and your needs increases the odds that you will meet compatible people.

Besides being honest, you should consider an app’s target demographic and use the apps that fit your needs well. 

185 SAVES

517 READS

When To Meet An Online Date

When To Meet An Online Date

Important predictors of relationship success, like communication, humor and personal compatibility, can only be better accessed in a real-life meeting.

Keep online, pre-meeting exchanges to two weeks or shorter and make it personal by asking about a specific part of someone’s profile or about likes and dislikes. 

205 SAVES

686 READS

SIMILAR ARTICLES & IDEAS:

Data On Online Dating

  • 40% of Americans use online dating as a way to meet new people.
  • 23% of Americans still think using online dating sites is desperate.

Data On Online Daters

  • 53% of Americans lie in their profiles. Women tend to post younger photos of themselves and claim to be thinner, while men tend to lie about their careers.
  • Even on apps known as being for "hook up", most females are looking for a genuine match and not a fling.
  • Two-thirds of online daters have gone out with someone they were matched with.
  • One-third of people who have used online dating have never actually gone on a date. 

Data On Relationships Started Online

  • Relationships that begin online are nearly 30% more likely to break down than ones where couples met face-to-face first.
  • 20% of committed relationships began online.
  • Marriages from online couples are three times as likely to end in divorce.
  • 17% of couples that were married in the last year met on a dating website. 

6 more ideas

Internet And Marriage

At least one-third of all marriages in the U. S. are now between partners who met online and researchers say online meeting-based marriages happen more quickly after the first date.

The Non-Divisive Effect

Before the Internet, dating was mostly restricted by one’s social and geographical limitations with friends of friends being the most common method of introduction. The Internet pairs couples that wouldn’t even meet otherwise.

Research also indicates that you're more likely to date someone from a different race if you're dating online, by a factor of about 7 percent. 

Combating Social Stratification

There's a troubling trend towards exclusive, private membership-based dating apps that only allow very rich or very popular people, essentially creating a dating bubble that socially isolates people by class.

By using less restrictive apps we have the widest possible pools of potential dates, rather than aspiring to something more exclusive, we're keeping ourselves open to more random love connections that cut across lines of race and class and everything else that divides us. We're doing our part to keep society more open, less stratified. 

Don’t Say What You Don’t Mean

Don’t Say What You Don’t Mean

When we meet someone we fancy online, it’s tempting to become an effusive people-pleaser in the hope that your affections will be reciprocated.

Going overboard with the compliments early o...

Don’t Lie About Yourself

Men are most likely to lie about their occupations on dating apps, whereas women tend to use old pictures or heavily edited recent ones.

Most lies people tell on dating apps aim to portray them in a way they think the other person will deem attractive. But tailoring your online image will set your date up for disappointment.

Don’t Use Emojis

Research indicates that only 8% of people think sending an emoji message will get you a reply in the first instance. It gives the impression that you have a small vocabulary and are lazy.

Try and start out with at least a sentence or two, ideally including a question the person can answer you. Basically you want to invite a conversation, not merely state your presence.