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Outside of normal working hours and with all the things you could be doing in a day, there usually isn’t much time left over to spare.
The fact that you and your significant other regularly choose to make time for each other is a good sign that you’re both committed.
Such acts of thoughtfulness may go from small and seemingly insignificant to as extravagant as buying matching jewelry. Keeping each other in mind to the point where you’re considering them in your regular purchases, you’re probably in a committed relationship.
Going into a major contract (other than marriage) with someone, such as buying property or a car, is a sign that things are pretty serious between you. Contracts are a big deal because they’re generally harder to get out of than to get into, so signing together means you expect to be committed for a long time.
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We don’t usually choose to spend several uninterrupted days or weeks of a vacation with people we don’t like a lot. You’re also making memories that last for a lifetime.
Those conversations are usually reserved for medical appointments and the occasional funny story.
If you can speak with your lover about intimate bodily functions, you’re probably more than casual friends; especially if you find that typically private and personal conversations become commonplace between the two of you.
In a committed relationship, however, it matters what the other person wants to do and where they see themselves in the future. So if you and your partner are making plans together, there’s a good likelihood that your relationship is in for the long haul.
It isn’t defined by the number of people in your life; instead, it’s the distance between what you want out of your relationships and what you’re getting.
So it’s absolutely possible t...
Have quick, non-threatening conversations throughout the day: make small talk with your barista, the cashier at the grocery store, anyone you encounter who seems receptive.
Think of them as stretching a muscle: not the same as a full workout, but beneficial nonetheless. When you’re lonely, you go inward, and just stretching that little bit can kick-start a process that helps you feel better.
Do something you find totally engaging, to the point you lose track of time.
That activity doesn’t have to be mentally engaging or intellectually rigorous. Maybe it’s reading, running, or cleaning. If you’re truly immersed in what you’re doing, no matter what it is, you won’t have the mental space to be consumed by loneliness.
We tend to see solitude as grim and imprisoning. But in fact, the exact opposite can be true. Solitude can be seen as freeing, as an opportunity for exploration and growth.
It’s always better to learn to stand on your own two legs. And once you are self-sufficient, then relying on someone else from time to time is an act of strength, not weakness.
Take small, consistent steps in the right direction, day in and day out.
Learning to be comfortable with being alone does not mean you can’t be in a relationship. It means that you will not be codependent and entitled.
What we need is a healthy dose of self-sufficiency. The greatest gift you can give somebody is your own personal development.