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How to Banish Imposter Syndrome and Embrace Everything You Deserve

https://www.themuse.com/advice/how-to-banish-imposter-syndrome-and-embrace-everything-you-deserve

themuse.com

How to Banish Imposter Syndrome and Embrace Everything You Deserve
Recently landed a promotion? Started managing a team? Been appointed to lead a project? Feel like you don't deserve any of it? Yes? Welcome to the club! You've experienced the crippling effects of imposter syndrome. It happens to the best of us-even if you've never heard of it.

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Stop feeling like a fraud

  • Once you’ve identified the confidence culprit, tell someone. Choose someone who sees you outside of that environment
  • Remind yourself of all of your achievements
  • Remind yourself that the people who got you here are incredibly competent and they did not make a mistake
  • Update your language with more confident, assertive phrases
  • Reframe your story by writing it down
  • Try mentoring

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Imposter syndrome

It occurs when we feel that we don't deserve our successes and the rewards that come along with them.

We believe they’re caused by luck, timing, or other factors outside of our control, instead of embracing the fact that we’re actually responsible for having made them happen.

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Young Achievers With Impostor Syndrome

  • Most of the young achievers having impostor syndrome feel like a fraud and are constantly judging themselves as not being up-to-the-mark in their endeavours.
  • Their parents may have empathized on achievements too much, and engaged in praising or criticizing them during their formative years.
  • They might attribute their achievements to pure luck, but blame themselves for their failures.

Five Ways To Handle Impostor Syndrome

  1. Instead of a constant judgement of your thoughts, we must find acceptance and get curious over the feelings, dumping the negativity around them.
  2. Delving a bit into our own childhood, we can try to be compassionate towards ourselves, gently handling our emotions and worries.
  3. Realize that the feeling of impostor syndrome is just a byproduct of being out of your comfort zone, and into the learning zone.
  4. Make use of the impostor syndrome to work hard and push yourself to improvise, for yourself.
  5. Engage with such feelings in a healthy, objective way and understand that your achievements are a sign of your intelligence.

Impostor Syndrome

It is a psychological phenomenon that reflects the belief that you’re an inadequate and incompetent failure despite evidence that indicates you’re skilled and quite successful.

The Perfectionist

They set the bar excessively high for themselves and when they fail to reach their goals, they experience major self-doubt. For this type, success is rarely satisfying because they believe they could’ve done even better.

But that’s not productive. Learning to celebrate achievements is essential if you want to avoid burnout and find contentment.

The Superwoman/man

Impostor workaholics are actually addicted to the validation that comes from working, not to the work itself. They push themselves to work harder, to measure up with their colleagues.

Start drifting away from external validation. No one should have more power to make you feel good about yourself than you.

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Trick your brain into calm

  • Become aware of your safety and breathing. Your fight or flight response may be in overdrive. 
  • Take note of five things you can see, four things you can hear, three ...

Using affirmations

Remind yourself how awesome you are with affirmations. Write down affirmations that remind you of your capabilities and strengths and keep them somewhere you can find them if nerves strike.

Another suggestion is to keep a file of praise, awards, and other evidence of how good you are at your job an read them when you are struggling with a confidence crisis.

Get clear about your feelings

Take a moment to really analyze what you’re feeling and strategize for that.

Can you reframe negative feelings, like fear, into something more positive, like anticipation? If not, remind yourself that it’s perfectly normal to be nervous before a high-stakes situation.