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The first step to stop seeking approval of others is to become aware that we are stuck on doubt, insecurity, or uncertainty. We must recognize that our actions (of seeking approval) comes from the emotions and beliefs that arise within us.
Once you become aware of how often you're seeking approval from others, you can begin to work on yourself from within.
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Sometimes you can be your own worst enemy by having negative thoughts about yourself.
But quashing these is key to recognizing your own worth.
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Don't worry about what other people are thinking, but instead solely focus on what makes you happy.
As we accept who we are, we find we donât need othersâ approval or input anymore, because we know the truth about ourselves.
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While there's nothing wrong by collaborating with other people, you don't want to be persuaded because you may not truly believe in your voice yet. By checking the accuracy of your beliefs, you will recognize that your story is not stable and therefore will be able to consider other perspectives, such as: 'I can consider I am good enough', or 'I can consider I am equal to everyone else', or 'I can consider the only person who can truly grant me confidence is myself,'" says Gura.
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Remember to be just as kind to yourself as you are to your friends. This includes doing kind things for yourself, practicing self-care, and letting others love you, as well as practicing self-compassion.
As we build our self-worth, our need to seek approval will diminish dramatically.
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Comprehending why you're constantly seeking approval from others can make it easier to eliminate the behavior altogether. "Before you turn to others for approval, stop and ask yourself, 'What do I think about this?' Then, 'Why donât I trust my own opinion in this matter?' Perhaps youâll find you are seeking approval because youâre uncertain, or perhaps you feel certain, but youâre seeking approval because you want someone else to like or accept you. Understanding the motive behind your need for approval is an important step in overcoming it.
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While writing is already considered to be therapeutic, it can help you figure out your internal struggles. Each day write a full page in a journal of just your top of head thoughts. At the end of the week go through the journal and circle consistent thoughts and feelings. Then on Friday make a list of the transcendent thought you had throughout the week and the circled words in your journal,.
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Don't let anyone else tell you your choices are not good enough. Hold on to your truth and allow it to absorb into your psyche. When you find your self going into judgment around it, label the judgment as defeating thoughts and push them away.
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The Millennial Generation is less likely to do this because they're generally more comfortable with themselves. It's probably because of how they were brought up by everyone 'being awarded' for just participating.
While this might sound silly, essentially you just want to enough gain enough confidence in yourself so you can automatically believe in the decisions you make.
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Just because you're not going down the same path as other people doesn't mean it's the wrong path. "Realize you are a unique being with a unique purpose and path in this world, any comparison or need for another's approval is apples to oranges. And, if you are tempted to compare to motivate you to being a better self, just remember to take those comparisons with a grain of salt; you might be comparing your real body to a photo-shopped one.
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Practice makes perfect, right?. Be kind and gentle with your self in this process. In no time at all, you will begin to experience a sense of well-being. This sense of well-being will grow into a generalized feeling of happiness, that you are safe and secure, content with who you are rather than who you think others want you to be.
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Sometimes you just need to take a break from being over stimulated by social media. Try to focus on other things like fixing up your resume or reading a new book to help your mind unwind. We become addicted to seeking approval through "likes" and other external accolades. We end up diminishing, second-guessing and getting down on ourselves for all of the things we haven't yet accomplished or acquired if we don't get that approval.
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Learning to trust your gut can be one of the best things you can do for yourself. It can help you understand the path you're supposed to take, and feel more confident in the direction you're going. If we practice, we can become so attuned to our inner voice that we always know what it's telling us and where it's guiding us, which is in the right direction.
We only get steered wrong when we stop paying attention to our inner voice and start paying attention to outside ones.
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