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About Everything Is F*cked Book
NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER
From the author of the international mega-bestseller The Subtle Art of Not Giving A F*ck comes a counterintuitive guide to the problems of hope.
We live in an interesting time. Materially, everything is the best it’s ever been—we are freer, healthier and wealthier than any people in human history. Yet, somehow everything seems to be irreparably and horribly f*cked—the planet is warming, governments are failing, economies are collapsing, and everyone is perpetually offended on Twitter. At this moment in history, when we have access to technology, education and communication our ancestors couldn’t even dream of, so many of us come back to an overriding feeling of hopelessness.
What’s going on? If anyone can put a name to our current malaise and help fix it, it’s Mark Manson. In 2016, Manson published The Subtle Art of Not Giving A F*ck, a book that brilliantly gave shape to the ever-present, low-level hum of anxiety that permeates modern living. He showed us that technology had made it too easy to care about the wrong things, that our culture had convinced us that the world owed us something when it didn’t—and worst of all, that our modern and maddening urge to always find happiness only served to make us unhappier. Instead, the “subtle art” of that title turned out to be a bold challenge: to choose your struggle; to narrow and focus and find the pain you want to sustain. The result was a book that became an international phenomenon, selling millions of copies worldwide while becoming the #1 bestseller in 13 different countries.
Now, in Everthing Is F*cked, Manson turns his gaze from the inevitable flaws within each individual self to the endless calamities taking place in the world around us. Drawing from the pool of psychological research on these topics, as well as the timeless wisdom of philosophers such as Plato, Nietzsche, and Tom Waits, he dissects religion and politics and the uncomfortable ways they have come to resemble one another. He looks at our relationships with money, entertainment and the internet, and how too much of a good thing can psychologically eat us alive. He openly defies our definitions of faith, happiness, freedom—and even of hope itself.
With his usual mix of erudition and where-the-f*ck-did-that-come-from humor, Manson takes us by the collar and challenges us to be more honest with ourselves and connected with the world in ways we probably haven’t considered before. It’s another counterintuitive romp through the pain in our hearts and the stress of our soul. One of the great modern writers has produced another book that will set the agenda for years to come.
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“Living well does not mean avoiding suffering; it means suffering for the right reasons.”—Mark Manson
Emotional gravity: People are pulled towards other people with similar histories and experiences like our own.
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“If you get off your ass and actively seek out pain, the body is anti-fragile. Meaning it gets stronger the more stress and strain you put on it.….but if you avoid stress and pain… your muscles will atrophy, your bones will become brittle and you will degenerate into weakness.”
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Hopelessness is the root of mental illness, anxiety and depression. It is the source of all misery, and cause of all addiction.
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Most of us believe that if we can avoid the pains and discomforts of life, we’ll be happy. With technological advancements and more and more services, we’re trying to make our lives easier. We buy things hoping they will solve all our problems. But as a result, we’re becoming more anxious and depressed. So, what do we do when everything is f*cked?
This book is follow-up to his mega-bestseller The Subtle Art Of Not Giving A F*ck, Mark Manson suggests that anger and sadness are not the opposite of happiness. According to him, the root cause of unhappiness is hopelessness.
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With hope, we get the strength to move forward as we believe in a better future. But the way we try to fill our current void of hopelessness is destructive. Having unrealistic beliefs about the perfect future is making us mentally ill and self-centered. We lose sight of virtues like courage, honesty, and humility in the pursuit of making our lives more comfortable, easier, and happier.
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You must love someone without expecting anything in return; otherwise it’s not truly love. You must respect someone without expecting anything in return; otherwise you don’t truly respect him. You must speak honestly without expecting a pat on the back or a high-five or a gold star next to your name; otherwise you aren’t truly being honest.
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Ultimately, we are moved to action only by emotion. That's because action is emotion.
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The only true form of freedom, the only ethical form of freedom, is through self-limitation. It is not the privilege of choosing everything you want in your life, but rather, choosing what you will give up in your life.
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The problem with hope is that it is fundamentally transactional - it is a bargain between one's current actions for some imagined, pleasant future. Don't eat this, and you'll go to heaven. Don't kill that person, or you'll get in trouble. Work hard and save your money, because that will make you happy.
To transcend the transactional real of hope, one much act unconditionally
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Immanuel Kant, a German philosopher argued that the most fundamental moral duty is the preservation and growth of consciousness, both in ourselves and in others. He called this principle of always putting consciousness first "the Formula of Humanity". This formula explains our basic moral intuitions. It explains the concept of virtue. It explains how to act in our day to day lives without relying on some imagined vision of hope.
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Act that you use humanity, whether in your own person or in the person of any other, always at the same time as an end, never merely as a means.
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Hope is fucked, but we need it more than ever. A book covering our world situation through a mix of psychology, philosophy and history.
One day, you and everyone you love will die. And beyond a small group of people for an extremely brief period of time, little of what you say or do will ever matter. This is the Uncomfortable Truth of life. And everything you think or do is but an elaborate avoidance of it. We are inconsequential cosmic dust, bumping and milling about on a tiny blue speack. We imagine our own importance. We invent our purpose - we are nothing.
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It feels as though the world has some sort of greater importance, yet in the scale of the infinitely expanding universe, we are nothing but another cluster of atoms.
You are the one who cares. You convince yourself that things matter in order to avoid the Uncomfortable Truth (the idea that our lifes are meaningless)
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"Something needs to matter because without something mattering, then there's no reason to go on living."
Hope is what keeps us going. If we have no belief in the future being better than the present, we spiritually die.
There needs to be some source of hope giving us a reason to get up in the mornings - and if we can't find it, we'll create it.
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We need three things:
Lose any of the three, and you lose the other two. Lose any of the three, and you lose hope.
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Hope does not even have to enter into the equation. Do not hope for a better life, simply be a better life.
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Nietzsche believed that we must look beyond hope and beyond values. We must evolve into something "beyond good and evil". For him, this morality of the future had to begin with something he called amor fati or love of one's fate.
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The victims of abuse are often the keenest observers of human nature.
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I have always been a prisoner of my emotional impulses.
“An inability to identify, tolerate, and seek out negative emotions is its own kind of confinement. If you feel okay only when life is happy and easy-breezy-beautiful-Cover-Girl, then guess what? You are not free. You are the opposite of free. You are the prisoner of your own indulgences, enslaved by your own intolerance, crippled by your own emotional weakness. You will constantly feel a need for some external comfort or validation that may or may not ever come.”
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Hate brings its own odd satisfaction and self assurance
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1st law - For every action, there is an equal and opposite emotional reaction.
2nd law - Our self worth equals the sum of our emotional over time.
3rd law - The identity will stay your identity until a new experience acts against it.
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