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10 Genuine Ways Anyone Can Be Exceptionally Charming

The waiter test

The waiter test

If you really want to know how an individual treats people, take him to lunch. How he interacts with the waiter is a much better indication of his interpersonal skills than how he interacts with you.

Charming people treat everyone the same way: as deserving of respect and kindness.

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Be Yourself And Be Ready For Rejection
Be Yourself And Be Ready For Rejection

Having charm is not about deceiving others. Keep strong negative feelings to yourself, do your best to reveal who you are and if you disagree with something, do so nicely.

No ma...

Be Swift and Sweet

Keep the conversation moving at a comfortable but somewhat brisk pace. Don’t cut the conversation short if things are going well, but also avoid hitting uncomfortable lulls. So when the pace starts to die down, it's time to make an exit.

On your way out make sure that the other remembers you. 

A Simple Touch Can Go A Long Way

Touch is a physical way of indicating acceptance and if properly timed it can be very charming

There's nothing wrong with a handshake when you introduce yourself, but beyond that, don't abuse touch. Stick to safe zones like the outside of the arm and upper back, and when in doubt, just stick to those handshakes.

Make People Feel Important

A charming person makes everyone, regardless of their status, feel important. People around them feel heard, understood, and worthy of their time.

Remember Names

It feels good to hear our own names, and when someone uses it we're more likely to pay greater attention to them.

Use mnemonic devices if you have a hard time remembering names.

Compliment With Confidence

When someone known for their charisma compliments you, it gives the impression that it is not only sincere but valuable, because of their natural confidence.

Dale Carnegie

“When dealing with people, let us remember we are not dealing with creatures of logic. We are dealing with creatur..."

Dale Carnegie
Handling People
  • Don’t criticize, condemn or complain. People learn faster and retain knowledge more effectively when rewarded for good behavior than punished for bad behavior.
  • Give honest and sincere appreciation. The only way to get a person to do anything is by giving them what they want.
  • Arouse in the other person an eager want. The only way to influence other people is to talk about what they want and show them how to get it.
Appreciation and flattery
  • Flattery is selfish and insincere. It’s cheap praise. You tell the other person precisely what he thinks about himself.
  • Appreciation is unselfish and sincere. It happens when we stop thinking about ourselves and begin to think of the other person’s good points.