Listening For A Higher Purpose - Deepstash
Conversation Starters

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How to ask open-ended questions

How to avoid awkward silences

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Conversation Starters

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Listening For A Higher Purpose

Listening can be for:

  • Information
  • What we know about
  • What we want to experience.

We need to work more into the deep levels of listening for motivations, values and feelings.


5.67K reads


From Really Bad To Okayish

Most of us are laughably bad at striking up good conversations with strangers, and can hope to improve ourselves if we learn what all is lacking to break the ice.

The conversation is mostly initiated by small talk, the opener that gets everything started. Most people hate s...


8.09K reads

The Art Of Listening: The Echo

Another way to signal your attentive listening is to simply echo what the other person is saying.


The Stranger says: At that moment, I felt frustrated.

You: You were frustrated.


5.82K reads

Triggering Conversations In A Suspicious World

Talking to strangers is worth it, as it offers a certain profound joy, a real communion. If more people start talking to strangers, our broken society can be healed.

  • The hardest thing about talking to strangers is the initiation of the conversation.
  • On...


9.02K reads

Talking To Strangers

Talking To Strangers

According to psychologists, talking to strangers can be taxing on the brain, and even small talk can seem stressful, tiring and cognitively demanding.

On the flip side, talking to strangers is a kind of workout that boosts our mental performance.


15.4K reads

Being Human

Asking something specific and humorous to a stranger is a risk, but if the timing is right, one can give a great first impression about being complex, empathetic, humourous and human.

Once the stranger recognizes you as a human, a bond is created and real conversat...


6.42K reads

Doing Conversation Starters Differently

  • When at a party, don’t ask ‘What do you do?’, instead, ask ‘What do you really want to do but cannot?’ or ‘Has your day lived up to your expectations?’
  • When a store clerk asks you ‘can I help you?’, reply with ‘can I help you?’

The point is to be different an...


6.54K reads

The Art Of Listening

  • While talking to strangers, we need to signal our engagement by summarizing or paraphrasing what the other person has said, to show that we were listening attentively.
  • We need to amplify our visible engagement with eye contact and nodding, as the other person does no...


4.88K reads

Why We Don’t Talk To Strangers

The main reason we don’t talk to strangers is simply because we don’t talk to strangers. People are simply not supposed to violate the norm of leaving other people alone at back alleys, parks and subways.

The trick is to acknowledge this handicap and pre-frame the ...


5.34K reads

The Stranger On The Subway: Asking Questions

  • Asking more questions, especially follow-up questions, is more than just for gathering information. 
  • They help create deep, emotional bonds and make the other person feel better as they are being listened to, understood, validated and cared for.
  • Most people don’t ask enough q...


4.77K reads

Helpful Techniques To Talk Better With Strangers

  1. Proximity: Suddenly meeting a stranger and asking something will almost certainly fail. One has to be in the proximity of the stranger for a while to be accepted.
  2. Don’t Make It An Interview: Being too interested in the other person c...


6.06K reads

Going Unscripted

We use scripted conversations to be on the safe side, as we fear that saying any unscripted word can trigger something unwanted in the other person.

While scripted conversations are efficient, they deny us the actuality of the other person, the stranger who may be just a friend we haven...


6.24K reads

Talking About The Weather: One Of The Most Common Conversation Starters

Many people hate it when the small talk is of the weather, but fail to understand that it is actually a kind of code that helps people overcome their inhibitions and be ready to actually talk to the other person.

Once the person who has been approached feels comfortable, real talk...


6.91K reads




Stashing about leadership and communication. Avid reader.

Conversation starters to connect with anyone you meet.

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Benefits of Making Mistakes

  • Mistakes point us to something we did not know
  • Help us see what matters and what does not
  • Inform us more about our values
  • Teach us more about others
  • Keep us connected to what works and what doesn’t work
  • Remind us of our humanity
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Understand the purpose of listening

Listening to someone can be difficult. But the more you practice, the easier it becomes.

One reason for trying to be a great listener is to show respect to everyone, and the best way to respect someone is to truly listen to them. Most likely, they'll reciprocate by listeni...

Establishing A Shared Purpose While Criticizing

Often people refuse to listen to feedback because they think we have ulterior motives. So, to have people listen to our feedback, we need to establish that our interests align by asking about their interests, and actively listening to their concerns.


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