Focus On The Positive Parts

Focus On The Positive Parts

We tend to focus on giving employees critical feedback. But, by focusing on their weaknesses, we only create competence. By focusing on their strengths, we create excellence.

Give equal measures of positive and negative feedback. We usually gloss over the strengths, but focus in great detail on the critical feedback. Add examples and details to your positive feedback.

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Communication

MORE IDEAS FROM THE ARTICLE

More Positive Than Negative Feedback

High-performing organizations deliver roughly five times as many positive statements (supportive, appreciative, encouraging) as negative ones (critical, disapproving, contradictory). That’s because our brains focus on negative feedback more than positive feedback.

Correct your employees, even criticize or confront them, but do so in a positive context. 

Emphasize Collaboration

Be objective when you speak about a negative event. Rather than placing blame or evaluating the problematic situation, describe it and its consequences, and suggest acceptable alternatives.

Be Aware Of Your Facial Expression

Someone’s smile activates the smile muscles in your own face, while their frown activates your frown muscles. We can discern whether someone is smiling even if we can’t see them.

Your smile is something to think about even if you are delivering feedback over the phone. Smile appropriately to project warmth and goodwill.

Maintain Eye Contact

You can predictably determine someone’s emotions from their gaze. Eye contact is the crucial first step for resonance, or a person’s ability to read someone else’s emotions.

Make and maintain eye contact when you’re giving someone feedback.

Control Your Voice

We are acutely aware of the voices of people we consider important, and the way we feel about another person shifts the way we speak. The tone of our voice, more than the words themselves, can give away how we feel.

Take An Easy Posture

The way you sit — slumped or sitting tall, arms open or crossed — transmits a message. Having your chest open, arms uncrossed, making sure to keep nodding, smiling, and vocalizing (saying things like “mm-hmm” and “yes”) will make people feel more connected to you.

Breathe

Stress or anger makes us breathe quickly and shallowly, and when tired or exasperated, we are more likely to sigh. Similarly, we may feel annoyance coming from someone who sighs a lot.

Before your conversation, take some deep, calming breaths, breathing out longer than you breathe in. Exhaling decreases your heart rate and blood pressure. Doing this for a couple of minutes before a meeting will make you and your interlocutor more at ease.

9. Pay Attention

Our minds often wander and we're not present in the moment, with the people in front of us. 

When you are not fully present, you are less likely to hear, understand and respond skillfully.

Be Authentic

According to research, when dealing with people who are not authentic, we often walk away feeling uncomfortable or manipulated and our blood pressure rises.

Show Compassion

Rather than seeing the feedback situation as “work” or a hassle, see it as an opportunity to connect with someone who has their own needs and pain. By remembering the common human experience, you’re more likely to bring kindness and compassion into the conversation.

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RELATED IDEAS

Offer a Solution

Clearly explain the reason for the conversation, the specific critique, and then offer suggestions to improve.

Even if the conversation is to fire an employee, you should still offer a suggestion that will help them improve in their next job.

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IDEAS

Questions serve a double purpose
Asking questions helps the participants to conversations process what’s happened and allows you to clarify and solidify details of the conversation. 
Don’t put it off

Don't put off a conversation for some ideal future time, when it can be more easily dealt with.

Take some time to cool down and plan the general outline of the outcome you desire. But then have the conversation, and make a plan to move on. 

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