Learn more about communication with this collection
How to create a positive work environment
Conflict resolution strategies
Effective communication in the workplace
Look At It As A Conversation
Go back to the concept of talking with someone rather than talking to someone.
It can help keep the other person cool, which pretty much always means you've won the argument.
312
1.22K reads
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Make It All About Them
The key to successful persuasion is to show how and why something matters in relation to that person's life and experience.
359
1.15K reads
Avoid Using Exaggerations
Words like "everybody, always, never" are broad generalizations.
They make your point unbelievable, while also angering whoever you're talking to.
325
982 reads
Validate Their Feelings
Saying things like 'I understand why you'd feel that way...' or 'Anyone would feel like that in the same situation' validates the other person's emotions and completely disarms them.
433
1.64K reads
Don't Lose Your Cool
Losing your temper will only anger the other person, which will heighten the argument.
If you can keep things calm, you might even be able to stop the argument.
334
1.02K reads
Switch Perspective
Step into the mind of the person you are arguing with and see their view.
This allows you to figure out what is influencing them and you can come back with a powerful counter-argument.
319
951 reads
Try To Politely Disengage
If the other person is truly getting out of control, it's often best to disengage. A perfect phrase to drop is: 'If you say so.'
321
1K reads
Keep Your Facts Straight
Quoting incorrect information weakens your point, which is essentially an automatic loss.
Check your facts and avoid yelling about any old thing. If you aren't sure about something, you can always say, "I'd need to look into that."
323
892 reads
Respect Their Point Of View
The best way to keep an argument calm is to be as kind as possible. Respectfully acknowledge the other person's viewpoint, even if you don't agree with it.
Say things like "I see what you're saying there," or "That's a good point."
313
760 reads
Try To Be More Persuasive
During an argument, think like a salesperson and try to be as persuasive as possible. Facts don't persuade, emotions do.
To pull on the other person's heartstrings, toss in some imagery or relate the story back to them. Hopefully, they'll calm down and see things your way.
337
932 reads
Use "I" Statements
Instead of casting blame and saying things like "you did this" and "you did that," try using "I" statements.
An 'I' statement stops people from becoming defensive when bringing up a topic of concern.
318
914 reads
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Get Out Of Your Head
Focusing too much on your own thoughts can leave you stressed and keep you from engaging. Try to let those distractions go when you're talking with someone so the person feels important and validated.
Mistakes during arguments
- "Holding: the absolute truth: We think that when we say something during a conflict, it is an absolute truth rather than a reflection of an experience. If I feel it, then it must be a fact.
- Using the words "always" and "never:" ...
Be A Conversation Superstar
Be attentive and give eye contact.
• Make active and engaged expressions.
• Repeat back what you’ve heard, and follow up with questions.
• If you notice something you want to say, don’t say it. Challenge it and go back to listening.
• For bonus points, wait an hour t...
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