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Why You Should Spend Your Money On Experiences, Not Things
Adaptation and happiness
Adaptation is the enemy of happiness.
We buy things to make us happy. And they do, but only for a while. New things are exciting to us at first, but then we adapt to them.
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Adaptation and happiness
Adaptation is the enemy of happiness.
We buy things to make us happy. And they do, but only for a while. New things are exciting to us at first, but then we adapt to them.
Experiences vs. Objects
Objects fade and become part of the new normal. So you’ll get more happiness spending money on experiences like going to art exhibits, doing outdoor activities, learning a new skill, or traveling.
Experiences really are part of ourselves. We are the sum total of our experiences.
Shared experiences
They connect us more than shared consumption.
Even if someone wasn’t with you when you had a particular experience, you’re much more likely to bond over both having hiked the Appalachian Trail or seeing the same show than you are over both owning Fitbits.
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Be Busy, But Not Rushed
Being “rushed” puts you on the fast track to being miserable.
Live a productive life at a comfortable pace. Learn to say no to busywork.
Have 5 Close Relationships
National surveys find that when someone claims to have 5 or more friends with whom they can discuss important problems, they are 60 percent more likely to say that they are ‘very happy’.
Excerpt from the book Finding Flow.
True friends really are worth their weight in gold. Check in regularly with close friends (around every two weeks).
Happiness And External Events
Self-esteem is good for confidence, but self-esteem that is bound to external success can be quite fickle.
Think of yourself less and avoid the trap of tying your self-worth to external signals.
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Think of Yourself Less
Humility is not thinking less of yourself, but thinking of yourself less. - CS Lewis
Self-esteem that is bound to external success can lead to small spurts of happiness but is no...
Be Busy, but Not Rushed
Research shows that feeling “rushed” is a one-way street to stress and unhappiness. Too much boredom can be burdensome.
To find a balance, learn to say "no" to opportunities that do not excite you.
Be Proactive About Your Relationships
Do:
- Check-in regularly with good friends (around 2 weeks for very close friends).
- Celebrate the good things in their life; let them know through active and constructive listening.
- Studies show people love hearing themselves talk and talking about themselves, so let them.
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Things that make us happy
- Having meaningful social relationships
- Being very good at something you do
- Having the freedom to make life decisions independently.
Three things that don't neces...
Irrelevant criteria
We know what will make us happy, but we don't know how to measure it. We measure our success by using social comparisons, like a salary, or with awards.
Because people tend to use vague criteria, they are never satisfied when they reach it and always want more. This leads to an unsustainable source of happiness.
Do what you enjoy
If you do what you enjoy and are naturally good at, and if you focus on it long enough, you will probably advance toward mastery anyway, and fame and money will be a byproduct.
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