Think Like a Friend - Deepstash

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How to Reduce Negative Self-Talk for a Better Life

Think Like a Friend

Decrease it’s negativity by imagining you are saying your self-talk to a friend. If you know you wouldn't say it in a certain way, think of how you'd share it instead or what you'd like a good friend to say to you. 

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Replace Self-Criticism

Our brains automatically look for evidence that matches up with what we believe about ourselves, but often disregards other evidence to the contrary.

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Talk Back

Talking back to your inner critic is an important part of taking away its power. 

Telling the critic you don’t want to hear what it has to say begins to give you a sense of choice in the matter. 

Separate The Critic From You

Self-criticism isn’t innate to us, it’s internalized based on outside influences, such as other people’s criticism, expectations, or standards. It’s a habit that can be unlearned or controlled.

One way to separate yourself from the self-criticism is to give it a name. Doing so, you better positioned to free yourself from its influence.

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Becoming Young

Being young is being curious. And most people become cynical and overly critical towards life as they grow older, and only a select few retain the wonder, innocence and joy of a child.

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Our Inner Critic

Our inner critic is usually formed in a system based on right and wrong answers and outperforming others on structured tasks. Listening to our inner critic will rarely improve our creative work - it may actually result in conformative work.

We need to turn this inner-critic into an inner-coach and drive our personal growth.

Re-educating Our Inner Critic

We do not need to suppress or kill our inner critic, but only need to re-educate it, but only need to deploy three simple ways to make space for the inner child:

  1. Get more playful in our creative endeavours.
  2. Skip doing something adults do in favour of doing something that kids love to do, like drawing, writing poems and playing in the pool.
  3. Practice constructive questioning by asking why to the things we (and others) take for granted.
How You Should Talk To Yourself

Search your heart on how you want to speak with yourself and hence, feel about yourself. Your answer has to be affirmative (formulate your sentences using “do” instead of “don’t, ” etc. ), writt...

Take a Break From Social Media

Studies show that social media increases self-criticism. Instead, spend some time paying attention to yourself and how you feel and see your life through your own eyes.

If you cannot be with yourself or speak to yourself respectfully, you shouldn’t expect others to. 

Write Out The Insults You Say To Yourself

Seeing it on a piece of paper will make it more obvious to you how self-deprecating your thoughts really are.

Your thoughts run so swiftly, you may not register it if you’re not paying attention. Writing it allows you to slow down and see the absurdity in your own negative self-talk.