Negative feelings that come up during the conflict need to be confronted. If they have not been fully worked out they need to be brought up again.
If this is not done effectively in the beginning things may look like they are sorted out only to resurface sometime later.
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The feelings and thoughts that arose during the conflict stage have to be worked out.
Unless this happens to everyone's satisfaction, the problem may go away for the moment, but the hard feelings or thoughts will persist, and then a repeat conflict might occur.
When it comes to games like Super Mario Bros,no one ever picks up the controller for the first time and then after jumping into a pit thinks, "I am so ashamed; that was such a failure," and then never want to try it again.
They think, "I've got to remember there's a pit there;...
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