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The Four Horsemen of The Relationship Apocalypse:
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It means getting to know your partner really well, including his/her internal psychological world.
Ask questions, deep and personal ones. Get past“When will you be there?” or “Don’t forget to pick up milk.”
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Admiration is about the story you tell yourself about your partner.
Masters see their partners as better than they really are. Disasters see their partners as worse than they really are.
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The best predictor of relationship success is how you and your partner tell your “story of us.”
Do you focus on the negative aspects or on the positive ones? Do you present your partner in a good light or in a bad light?
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... is the most important part of a relationship.
How you start those serious relationship discussions predicts how the conversation goes. Start off positive and calm. And then listen.
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Power in relationships is the ability of each person in the relationship to influence each other and direct the relationship.
Being in control makes people feel good and may place the ...
Not all power struggles are destructive. Some types of power struggles allow growth within the relationship and encourage a deeper understanding and respect for each other.
While it is still a struggle, by the end of it, you have reached an understanding about which lines can be crossed, which not, and how much each partner is able to compromise.
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Merging your own ever-shifting life, needs and wants with those of another person takes work if it is to succeed.
How much work it actually takes might ebb and flow, but expect to inve...
Loving your partner's flaws is not always realistic. Some people have habits that are slightly disgusting and impossible to "love."
Simply accepting them and learning how to shrug them off and minimize their importance is much more realistic.
The context might be such that you just can’t solve a problem before bed. Be realistic and settle for an agreement to never go to bed without at least deciding when to continue the discussion or argument.
Also, some people actually need to cool down before they can continue a productive discussion, so taking a break could be wise.
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The Negativity Effect magnifies and distorts your partner's faults, whether real or imaginary.
The partner starts to wonder why isn't there any appreciation for all the good that is being done, and why the focus is only on the one bad thing.
Relationships, especially long-term ones, don't get better with time but are kept intact by avoiding decline.
Married couples find contentment in other sources and remain satisfied with each other, and if not so, then the marriage breaks down.