Grief does you, you don’t do grief - Deepstash

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How to Recover From a Breakup the Healthy Way

Grief does you, you don’t do grief

Grief is like a squall in the middle of the ocean. It comes without warning and despite how hard you try to avoid it or suppress it, you can’t. Let the tears, screams and sobs pour out of you.

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SIMILAR ARTICLES & IDEAS:

Change and the unchangeable
We like to think that things can be changed. That we are in control somehow.  That's why “never” hurts, because never means that it can’t be changed. “Never” means it’s over. It’s gone. And ...
Meaning and relationships
  • We generate meaning through relationships. And meaning is the fuel of our minds. 
  • Our relationships also define our understanding of ourselves. And when one of these relationships is destroyed, that part of our identity is destroyed along with it. 
Depression vs. sadness
  • Sadness occurs when something feels bad. 
  • Depression occurs when something feels meaningless. 

When something feels bad, at least it has meaning. In depression, everything becomes a big blank void. 

Jack Mezirow

"By far the most significant learning experience in adulthood involves critical self-reflection - reassessin..."

Jack Mezirow
3 areas of life to clarify

You need to have absolute clarity over 3 fundamental facts:

  • Your goals (the destination)
  • Your current situation (your coordinates)
  • The path that connects both of them (the route).

A very simple, but crucial principle: if you don’t know where you are, you can never reach the place where you want to be.

The world of the status quo bias

Making an alternative choice is hard because we are neurologically wired to favor the default solution, even if it brings suboptimal results.

As the complexity of a decision increases, so does our tendency to stick with the answer we know.

Use the Chameleon Effect

When you lack motivation, sit next to a focused co-worker you don't know that well. This will help you because:

  • You feed off the other person's concentration: we tend to copy the ...
Find An Accountability Partner

Imagine how you could transform your relationship with your vendors for example (accountant, lawyer, employees, etc.) by becoming accountability partners.

Pre-commit

Do it especially when you know you're going to procrastinate. This means:

  • That you have to decide what you're going to do. Be clear about the timing of your tasks.
  • That you have to plan when and where you're going to do it.