The economic realities of the 19th century mixed with the idea from the Enlightenment about the pursuit of happiness. The result was the Age of Romanticism. People became economically independent and love (or emotions) became valued in society. These ideals of love have been heavily promoted and marketed during the 20th century.

"Happily ever after" ideal

The ancient Greek philosopher Plato argued that the highest form of love was brotherly love or platonic love.

Plato on love

For most of human history, there was no time for romance. Marriages were arranged by families and were a purely economic arrangement designed to promote the survival and prosperity of both extended families. It wasn’t until the industrial age that things began to change. They didn't have to rely so heavily on family connections any more. Consequently, the economic and political components of marriage ceased to make sense.

The industrial age changed romance

People often overestimate love’s ability to overcome whatever issues or problems present in their relationships. Love can sometimes be unpleasant or painful. It requires self-discipline, understanding and a certain amount of sustained effort over the course of years. It comes with a requirement for personal responsibility.

Love is complicated

Second Fact: Humans evolved the ability to become attached to each other - that is, the ability to love each other - because it helped us survive. This isn't exactly romantic or sexy, but it's true. We didn't evolve big fangs or huge claws or insane gorilla strength.