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We don't understand how parenting works
Children are not just shaped by the power of parenting. Children are also shaped by forces like genes, peers, and the culture children grow up in. This can make it difficult to know which forces influence who children become.
Just because we care about parenting or feel confident about it doesn't mean we understand it.
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- Parents do matter. But how they matter is complex and difficult to predict.
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Parents want what is best for their children. Many parenting books promise to reveal how to achieve the best outcomes. The constant message is that if your child isn't succeeding, you're doing something wrong.
Children that are raised in the same house are not noticeably more alike in how successful they are or how happy or self-reliant they are.
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