Learn more about communication with this collection
How to close the deal
How to handle objections
How to present your value to your employer
Conversational Tones
Think about your e-communication like cholesterol, meaning that there are two kinds of conversational tones: positive and negative.
- Positive-toned communication: phrases such as “This is great,” “I really like . . . ‚” and “Thank you,” through greetings (“Dear so-and-so”) and closings (“Best wishes”), and also in emojis such as smiley faces etc.
- Negative-toned communication: negations and other phrases like “I don’t think . . .” and “This is a problem” and the even harsher “I am not happy with . . ..”
It is the ratio of positive to negative that is really important for our e-communication.
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MORE IDEAS ON THIS
I, Me, Myself
Using a lot of “I, me, mine” words can reflect a neurotic or ruminative self-focus, in natural conversation it often takes the form of hedging (e.g., “I think this might work”). But it also can reflect dominance.
According to researchers, the ideal rank order of pe...
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257 reads
The Types Of Engagement
According to researchers, three types of engagement can be measured via your words: emotional engagement, social engagement, and task engagement.
Let’s face it: relationship building is more difficult over email than face-to-face. One key to building a relationship vi...
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324 reads
Putting Pride Aside
People behave differently when they are not face-to-face. They are more negative and, often, more presumptuous, conveying the impression that they are entitled and not easy to work with. This is a problem because excessive pride or hubris harms our ability to locate the sweet spo...
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The Task
Examine at least three exchanges between you and another person, using these three indexes. Are you engaged? Is the other person engaged? On what dimensions: emotional, social, task?
- First, do not begin messages with anything negative. Why? This creates a general gloomy tone...
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245 reads
You And I
As a second step in analyzing your own email communication, count all your pronouns—e.g., “I,” “me,” “you,” “us,” “our,” “we,” etc. Personal pronouns reflect attention to people rather than to objects or concepts.
The more personal pronouns are present, the more people are...
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310 reads
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3. Can vs. Can’t
Whether you think you can or you think you can’t, you’re right.
Sounds cliché, but it’s the hard truth. Believing that you can in fact achieve your dreams is the first step to making them come true.
The easiest way to shift your mind from can’t to ...
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There are three types of communications amplified by power:
- Direct communication: even feedback (positive or negative) from someone in a position of power can easily become amplified.
- Silence: when a company is going through a crisis for exa...
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