Personal Responsibility Breeds Success - Deepstash

deepstash

Beta

Get an account to save ideas & make your own & organize them how you wish.

deepstash

Beta

Making Excuses Zaps Your Motivation. So Don't Do It.

Personal Responsibility Breeds Success

Making excuses allows you to externalize your failures and blame something else. It also demotivates you when you feel the outcomes in your life are out of your control.

Taking up responsibility does the opposite: It leads to introspection where you can analyze what you could have done differently. It will motivate you to work better and harder.

609 SAVES


This is a professional note extracted from an online article.

Read more efficiently

Save what inspires you

Remember anything

IDEA EXTRACTED FROM:

Making Excuses Zaps Your Motivation. So Don't Do It.

Making Excuses Zaps Your Motivation. So Don't Do It.

https://riskology.co/making-excuses/

riskology.co

3

Key Ideas

Excuses Breed More Failure

When you are disappointed, you have two choices on how to respond:  You can find out how you could have done it differently, or you can tell yourself that you were not at fault.

Shifting the blame has a negative cascading effect on how you behave in the future.

Personal Responsibility Breeds Success

Making excuses allows you to externalize your failures and blame something else. It also demotivates you when you feel the outcomes in your life are out of your control.

Taking up responsibility does the opposite: It leads to introspection where you can analyze what you could have done differently. It will motivate you to work better and harder.

How To Stop Making Excuses

It all comes down to the stories you tell yourself when you feel overwhelmed or fail.

If you work too much and don’t have time for fun, do you tell yourself that people demand too much from you? Or, do you tell yourself you don’t prioritize your own time well enough?

In one story you are in control, and the other you are not. Focus on the story you can control.

SIMILAR ARTICLES & IDEAS:

Defining excuses

Excuses are rationalizations we make to ourselves about people, events, and circumstances. 

They are invented reasons we create to defend our behavior, to postpone taking action or simpl...

The Fear Trap

We make excuses for the following key reasons:

  • Fear of Failure
  • Fear of Embarrassment
  • Fear of Success
  • Fear of Change
  • Fear of Uncertainty
  • Fear of Responsibility
  • Fear of Making Mistakes
  • Perceived lack of confidence or resources
To successfully eliminate excuses we must first consider removing all traces of fear. Fear paralyzes us and prevents forward movement in all areas of our lives.
'There’s just not enough time'
This excuse means a lack of desire, focus, discipline, and direction.
It suggests the wrong priorities or time management problems. It could also indicate laziness or procrastination.

10 more ideas

Excuses

People use excuses to rationalize their actions regarding their circumstances, their actions toward other people, and regarding certain events. It is also one of the primary reasons why people are ...

Stop comparing

When you are comparing yourself to others, you are probably only seeing part of the whole picture.

If you are making an excuse not to try something new, because you are comparing yourself to others who are experts in the field, remember that they were also inexperienced at some stage.

Stop fearing the unknown

The unknown can be scary, but it may not be a negative thing. Many good things can come from taking a step into the unknown.

11 more ideas

Own it

Take responsibility for whatever you did and understand the possible impact. 

Give yourself room to be wrong, and don't defend yourself in hindsight. Defensiveness is your number ...

Be proactive about solutions

Pinpoint how did the mistake happen and where things went wrong. Then ask yourself what you can do to fix the problem.

Assess if you need help or you can fix it on your own. Don't try to sweep it under the rug--that could backfire.

Communicate with those affected

Communicate the mistake to those affected or to those who can help, in ways that appeal to people's humanity.

Be sincere. Show that you care to fix it.  Be honest about your struggles.

2 more ideas

Don't take credit

Bad leaders take credit for the good things and pin any blame for bad things to others.

Good leaders let the credit go to the team and team members. They only call attention to themselves wh...

Don't call attention to yourself

Your task is to help your team and team members do good work. You should understand that the mission is important, not you.

As a leader, you’re just there to make things work better.

Your coaching style

Coaching should be your primary tool in leading. If your coaching sessions seem more like you’re the therapist and your team member the patient, you’re doing it wrong. 

Your team members should pay attention to how it will be different in the future.

Excuse-making

It's a defense mechanism you use in the battle between your positive self-identity and the common challenges of everyday life.

This habit comes down to an inherent need to protect your...

The self-serving bias

It encourages you to claim your successes and to deflect your failures.

When something good happens, you take the credit, but when something bad happens, you blame it on something out of your control.

Common types of excuses
  • Lies: This is one of the worst types of excuses—a straight-up lie.
  • Self-handicapping excuses: Such as “I don’t have the skills to do that”, or “That’s not my job.”
  • Blame-shifting excuses: Instead of putting the blame on your lack of abilities, you accuse external factors for your missteps or lack of performance.

one more idea

Focus on learning

The chips aren’t always going to fall where you want them to, but if you understand that reality going in, you can be prepared to wring the most value out of the experience, no matter the outcom...

Redefining failure

Behind many fears is worry about doing something wrong, looking foolish, or not meeting expectations — in other words, fear of failure. By framing a situation you’re dreading differently before you attempt it, you may be able to avoid some stress and anxiety.

Approach goals vs. avoidance goals

Goals can be classified as approach goals or avoidance goals based on whether you are motivated by wanting to achieve a positive outcome or avoid an adverse one.

When you’re dreading a tough task and expect it to be difficult and unpleasant, you may unconsciously set goals around what you don’t want to happen rather than what you do want.

one more idea

The power of charisma
Charismatics can make us feel charmed and great about ourselves. They can inspire us to excel. They hypnotize us.

But they can also be dangerous. They can use charisma for their own purp...

Defining charisma

The German sociologist from the early 20th-century Max Weber wrote charisma is a quality that sets an individual “apart from ordinary men,” and causes others to treat him as “endowed with supernatural, superhuman, or at least specifically exceptional powers or qualities.”

Charismatic techniques can be taught

Charismatic Leadership Tactics range from the use of metaphors and storytelling to nonverbal methods of communication like open posture and animated, representative gestures at key moments.

The more charismatic leadership tactics used, the more individuals will be seen as leader-like by others.

3 more ideas

Overlooking Failure

Societies with a bias towards success, that are idolizing of successful people usually overlook the decisions that led to failure.

We tend to overlook cases that did not come with a successfu...

Mental Models

The way you look at how something works in the real world is called a mental model. It’s your thinking framework about something.

But when we make decisions, we often don’t think about our framework and immediately jump to a discussion about potential outcomes.

Fyodor Dostoevsky
Fyodor Dostoevsky

“Everything seems stupid when it fails.”

4 more ideas

Fixed vs. Growth Mindset

Growth Mindset:

  • tend to understand basic abilities as malleable, and believe they can be developed over time.
  • love new challenges and view setbacks as opport...
How to change your mindset

The 3 steps to encourage a change in mindset:

  1. Observe your mindset.
  2. Challenge your beliefs
  3.  Build a “growth” muscle.
Observe your mindset
You can’t begin to change a “fixed” mindset until you recognize it. 

Notice if you rush to conclusions about fundamental abilities:

  • Do you tell yourself that you’re no good at a particular task, so there’s no point attempting it 
  • Do you believe that success in certain kinds of activities are reserved for people who are naturally gifted?
  • Do you worry that if you try your hardest and fail at something, you’ll be exposed as “no good”?

2 more ideas

Mental models

They are chunks of knowledge that can be simplified and applied to better understand the world, by identify what information is relevant in any given situation, and th...

Reasons we fail to make the best decision possible
  • We’re (sometimes) stupid: irrational, tired or distracted;
  • We have the wrong information;
  • We use the wrong model;
  • We fail to learn;
  • We go with what's easy over what's right.