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When you are disappointed, you have two choices on how to respond: You can find out how you could have done it differently, or you can tell yourself that you were not at fault.
Shifting the blame has a negative cascading effect on how you behave in the future.
Making excuses allows you to externalize your failures and blame something else. It also demotivates you when you feel the outcomes in your life are out of your control.
Taking up responsibility does the opposite: It leads to introspection where you can analyze what you could have done differently. It will motivate you to work better and harder.
It all comes down to the stories you tell yourself when you feel overwhelmed or fail.
If you work too much and don’t have time for fun, do you tell yourself that people demand too much from you? Or, do you tell yourself you don’t prioritize your own time well enough?
In one story you are in control, and the other you are not. Focus on the story you can control.
SIMILAR ARTICLES & IDEAS:
Excuses are rationalizations we make to ourselves about people, events, and circumstances.
They are invented reasons we create to defend our behavior, to postpone taking action or simpl...
We make excuses for the following key reasons:
Take responsibility for whatever you did and understand the possible impact.
Give yourself room to be wrong, and don't defend yourself in hindsight. Defensiveness is your number ...
Pinpoint how did the mistake happen and where things went wrong. Then ask yourself what you can do to fix the problem.
Assess if you need help or you can fix it on your own. Don't try to sweep it under the rug--that could backfire.
Communicate the mistake to those affected or to those who can help, in ways that appeal to people's humanity.
Be sincere. Show that you care to fix it. Be honest about your struggles.
It's a defense mechanism you use in the battle between your positive self-identity and the common challenges of everyday life.
This habit comes down to an inherent need to protect your...
It encourages you to claim your successes and to deflect your failures.
When something good happens, you take the credit, but when something bad happens, you blame it on something out of your control.