Set want-to goals, not have-to ones - Deepstash
Boost Your Emotional Intelligence

Learn more about psychology with this collection

How to handle conflicts

How to identify and regulate emotions

How to develop self-awareness

Boost Your Emotional Intelligence

Discover 40 similar ideas in

It takes just

4 mins to read

Set want-to goals, not have-to ones

  • Have-to goals are goals set for you by others in the form of pressure, for example, your doctor telling you you must lose weight.
  • Want-to goals are those you set out of conviction and after careful reflection of your true values. 


3.21K reads


Behavioral contagion

Behavioral contagion

The ultimate social influence, it’s what causes us to pursue certain behaviors merely because we’re close to someone doing the same. 

This can be physical proximity or psychological relatedness through the media, for example.


3.07K reads

Show up to your emotions, even the bad ones

 Forced optimism can’t be sustained, which means it’s only a temporary solution to a permanent problem.

That’s because even negative emotions can have positive consequences, as long as you face them directly and draw the right conclusions. So don’t smile when you don’t feel...


3.65K reads

Your values will lead the way

Values are what helps you make the small, conscious decisions that add up to a life well-lived.

To help you identify your values, each day habitually ask yourself, “As I look back at today, what did I do that was actually worth my time?”


3.19K reads

Emotional agility

Emotional agility

It means being aware and accepting of all your emotions, even learning from the most difficult ones.

It also means getting beyond conditioned or preprogrammed cognitive and emotional responses to live in the moment with a clear reading of present circumsta...


3.84K reads


“The most effective way to transform your life, therefore, is not by quitting your job and moving to an ashram, but, to paraphrase Teddy Roosevelt, by doing what you can, with what you have, where you are.”



3.94K reads


“The ultimate goal of emotional agility is to keep a sense of challenge and growth alive and well throughout your life.”



4.4K reads


“Courage is not an absence of fear; courage is fear walking.”



4.74K reads


"Emotionally agile people are dynamic… able to tolerate high levels of stress and to endure setbacks… to act according to their most cherished values and pursue big, long-term goals."



5.71K reads


Mentally create distance by imagining going above or far away from the thought you are having.



3.24K reads

Bottling and brooding

Bottling and brooding

  • Bottlers ignore, push aside, and avoid—sometimes getting repaid with unexpected outbursts.
  • Brooders complain, wearing out their friends, spouses, or themselves as they rehearse what might have been or what will be—but never moving on.


3.51K reads




Advertising account executive

Related collections

More like this

"Have to" and "Want to" goals

"Have to" and "Want to" goals

  • Have to” goals are set externally  ( e.g.: a doctor tells you that you should lose weight) and may be more effortful to reach;
  • “Want to” goals are the ones you feel internally motivated to accomplish  (you do your workout because you love how it makes you feel) and usually don't need...

Set Clear and Achievable Goals

The first step towards mastering consistency is to set clear and achievable goals. Your goals should be specific, measurable, and realistic. Instead of saying “I want to get fit,” set a goal like “I want to go for a 30-minute walk five days a week” or “I want to lose 5 pounds in the next month.” ...



Anti-goals represent a palpable set of values and actions that we don’t want to have and do. For example:

  • Not wanting to be buried in debt or living above my means
  • Not wanting to be stuck in the office until midnight
  • Not wanting to be unfit or over ...


Explore the World’s

Best Ideas

200,000+ ideas on pretty much any topic. Created by the smartest people around & well-organized so you can explore at will.

An Idea for Everything

Explore the biggest library of insights. And we've infused it with powerful filtering tools so you can easily find what you need.

Knowledge Library

Powerful Saving & Organizational Tools

Save ideas for later reading, for personalized stashes, or for remembering it later.

# Personal Growth

Take Your Ideas


Organize your ideas & listen on the go. And with Pro, there are no limits.

Listen on the go

Just press play and we take care of the words.

Never worry about spotty connections

No Internet access? No problem. Within the mobile app, all your ideas are available, even when offline.

Get Organized with Stashes

Ideas for your next work project? Quotes that inspire you? Put them in the right place so you never lose them.


2 Million Stashers


5,740 Reviews

App Store


72,690 Reviews

Google Play

Sean Green

Great interesting short snippets of informative articles. Highly recommended to anyone who loves information and lacks patience.

Ashley Anthony

This app is LOADED with RELEVANT, HELPFUL, AND EDUCATIONAL material. It is creatively intellectual, yet minimal enough to not overstimulate and create a learning block. I am exceptionally impressed with this app!

Shankul Varada

Best app ever! You heard it right. This app has helped me get back on my quest to get things done while equipping myself with knowledge everyday.


Don’t look further if you love learning new things. A refreshing concept that provides quick ideas for busy thought leaders.

Giovanna Scalzone

Brilliant. It feels fresh and encouraging. So many interesting pieces of information that are just enough to absorb and apply. So happy I found this.

Ghazala Begum

Even five minutes a day will improve your thinking. I've come across new ideas and learnt to improve existing ways to become more motivated, confident and happier.

Laetitia Berton

I have only been using it for a few days now, but I have found answers to questions I had never consciously formulated, or to problems I face everyday at work or at home. I wish I had found this earlier, highly recommended!

Jamyson Haug

Great for quick bits of information and interesting ideas around whatever topics you are interested in. Visually, it looks great as well.

Read & Learn

20x Faster





Access to 200,000+ ideas

Access to the mobile app

Unlimited idea saving & library

Unlimited history

Unlimited listening to ideas

Downloading & offline access

Personalized recommendations

Supercharge your mind with one idea per day

Enter your email and spend 1 minute every day to learn something new.


I agree to receive email updates