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Think you're special? That just proves you're normal | Oliver Burkeman
We are predictable
Most of us are more normal and far less special than we'd like to believe.
Thinking you are different is just one more way in which you're normal.
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We are predictable
Most of us are more normal and far less special than we'd like to believe.
Thinking you are different is just one more way in which you're normal.
Illusory superiority
Your intelligence, your creativity, the degree to which the world has mistreated you are all normal and less quirky than you think.
Most people think they're above average drivers or they are unbiased. Or they believe they are special in a negative way. This all is known as illusory superiority.
Normal is good
Don't feel repelled by the normal. The ordinary is what shapes you. To dislike the normal means disdain for most of what happens in your life. But that is normal too. However, it's a recipe for a joyless life.
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Nobody can assess ease and difficulty objectively
We get to know the world and its challenges through a unique, personal experience, which nobody else can see, so nobody has a direct view of what’s easy or hard in the experience of others. We piece together what’s “normal” by observing how others, on the whole, seem to be doing at the same challenges.
Perception and experience
Two people’s experiences of the same challenge differ wildly, beyond any desire, effort, and perseverance. But most of the messages we get about success (at school, at work, in the media) minimize everything else. Nobody can ever tell you how hard or easy something should be for you. They don’t have enough information.