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Humans are tribal. We evolved in small groups where it was a bad idea to stand out.
When we’re faced with a choice between being correct or being accepted, more often than not we choose the latter.
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When it comes to changing our minds two things that stand out are:
We’re most likely persuaded by people we like. When’s the last time you didn’t like or respect someone and...
Changing our minds can result in a perception that we’re losing status. We need psychological safety in order to do it. We need to know that we’re not going to lose a friend. We need to know that promotions are not affected by disagreement.
One of the reasons it’s easi...
Persuasion isn’t always here’s the facts, you’re either an idiot or you’re not. It’s here are the facts and here is a sensitivity to your state of mind. And it’s the facts plus the sensitivity when convolved together create impact.
Persuading others, and even ourselves is about more than just putting facts out there and letting the chips fall as they may. You simply can’t have the impact you want with facts alone.
The first thing we do when people disagree with us is attempt to educate them by giv...
The most difficult subjects can be explained to the most slow-witted man if he has not formed any idea of them already; but the simplest thing cannot be made clear to the most intelligent man if he is firmly persuaded that he knows already, without a shadow of doubt, w...
While you have to understand the facts and arguments, you really need to understand what’s already in their head and how those ideas got there in the first place before you can change someone’s mind.
Faced with a choice between changing one’s mind and proving there is no need to do so, almost everyone gets busy with the proof.
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It's a tendency to heavily weigh the moment which is closer to the present, as compared to something in the near or distant future.
Example: If you are offered a choice of $150 right now or $180 after 30 days, you would be more inclined to choose the money you are offe...
Seeing our lives as being driven is not new to psychology. Freud mapped out his 5 stages of development, that not only propel a child’s development but can shape the adult’s. And Maslow became famous for his Hierarchy of Needs, which moves up from the biological to self-actualizing. As these auth...
When we’re young, we tend to value the opinions of our friends more than we value our own. We tend to think that many of those around us have things figured out. We feel that they really know what they’re doing while we’re still trying to determine what life i...
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