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We unfairly judge ourselves on the specifics of the conversation while we judge the other person on warmth and friendliness.
Based on the referenced study, the actual likeness is about 12% higher than the perception.
Audience Tuning Effect: Tendency to adjust our language and context based on who we are talking to
Saying is Believing Effect: When we take audience tuning too far, we begin to muddy our own reality, memory, and opinions
Thanks, but No Thanks Experiment: We overestimate how awkward it is to receive a compliment and we underestimate how good a compliment makes us feel
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Everyday people have more influence than they give themselves credit for.
The Invisibility Cloak Illusion: Tendency to (incorrectly) believe that you notice people more than they notice you
We almost always underestimate how many people are paying attention to us
The Spotlight Effect: Tendency to overestimate how much other...
When we think of influence, we don’t generally tend to think about the influence we naturally have, which is why we probably have more influence than we think.
Basing your happiness on comparisons isn’t helpful because we are hopeless at setting reliable benchmarks for those comparisons”
Tourist information centre manager
Our biases and blindspots relating to us.
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