Much of our desire to take on extra tasks and responsibilities comes from a sense of obligation to others, experts agree, but even that can be self-directed. Seventy-five percent of the time, the guilt is coming from inside the house. You are making it up in your own head.
Before making a decision about whether to care a little less or to turn down a favor that’s asked of you, you need to ask yourself whether saying no would have a negative effect or comes from a mean-spirited place
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Say No more often.
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Many adopt values from other pre-packaged sources, like a religion, culture, or legal system. But, by adopting a value system without reflection, you make way for personal values that cause conflict between your perceived beliefs and the actions you take.
To find your own values:
We do not give our emotions any thought, and move through them mechanically, making them the masters of our behaviour. Anyone can push the wrong buttons and trigger us in a few seconds.
We need to be aware of our emotions and feelings by asking ourselves the following:
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