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The Ripple Effects of a Thank You
The Witness To Gratitude
Studies show that people who witness the act of gratitude get affected positively towards the grateful person as well as the person who is being thanked (benefactor).
They see the grateful person as someone who is kind, and who notices when other people do kind things and takes the time to acknowledge them, making them socially desirable. People also warm up towards the person that is receiving the gratitude, as it is signaled as a person who is effective at being supportive or helpful.
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Thank You!
Being thankful and saying thanks to others is good for our health and happiness, and helps build trust.
Normally, the act of saying thanks is observed as a two-person exchange, the person giving thanks and the one receiving it. New studies reveal that the benefits spread beyond the two people involved.
The Witness To Gratitude
Studies show that people who witness the act of gratitude get affected positively towards the grateful person as well as the person who is being thanked (benefactor).
They see the grateful person as someone who is kind, and who notices when other people do kind things and takes the time to acknowledge them, making them socially desirable. People also warm up towards the person that is receiving the gratitude, as it is signaled as a person who is effective at being supportive or helpful.
Saying Thanks More Often
Expressing more gratitude works, and more so if done in a demonstrative way, with a hug or flowers.
A sincere thanks benefit our social connections in the entire group or circle.
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Key Ideas
Count your blessings
Spend 5 to 10 minutes at the end of each day writing in detail about three things that went well that day, large or small, and also describing why you think they happened.
Mental subtraction
You don’t know what you’ve got till its gone.
Consider the many ways in which important, positive events in your life—such as a job opportunity or educational achievement—could have never taken place, and then reflecting on what your life would be like without them.
Savor
We have a tendency to adapt to pleasurable things—a phenomenon called “hedonic adaptation”—and appreciate them less and less over time.
We can interrupt this process by trying the Give it Up practice, which requires temporarily giving up pleasurable activities and then coming back to them later, this time with greater anticipation and excitement.
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If virtue leads to a life well lived
How do we become virtuous?
Virtue comes from living an examined life - one where deep deliberation leads to holding on to noble qualities such as honesty and generosity, regardless of h...
The link between gratitude and self-control
Gratitude encourages people to repay debts. The more gratitude people feel toward those who have helped them, the more diligently they will work to return the favour.
When you want to repay someone you have to forgo your own immediate needs in service of someone else. This action boils down to self-control.
For instance, when you are grateful that a friend helped you to move to a new apartment, you are more likely to return the favor, even if you have to forgo something you looked forward to.
Gratitude enhances honesty
In a study published in Psychological Science, participants were presented with temptation. Those who recalled a time when they felt grateful were more likely to act in an honest manner than those who described a time when they felt happy or neutral.
People who feel grateful are more likely to help others, divide their profits and be loyal even at a cost to themselves.
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Key Ideas
Happy people are well rounded people
- They savor the moment. They "stop to smell the roses".
- They're busy, but not rushed. A healthy work-life balance is key.
- They don't sweat the small stuff...
Happy people invest in their relationships
- They spend money on others. One reason is that it creates social connections.
- They celebrate other people's success through "active and constructive" responding.
- They treat everyone with respect and kindness. Kindness, like happiness, is contagious.
- They're proactive about relationships. They work on maintaining their relationships.
- They express gratitude. It improves mood and energy and decreases anxiety.
- They engage in deep, meaningful conversations.
The attitude of happy people
- They're optimistic. Bad things happen to all of us. Happy people don't complain, whine or let pessimism become a self-fulling prophecy.
- They view problems as challenges. They focus on solutions to the problem and reflect on what they're grateful for.
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