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Why Teenagers Reject Parents' Solutions to Their Problems

Moving Towards A Solution

  • Offering our kids an ear, empathy and encouragement helps them tremendously and moves the needle towards the best solution.
  • Asking teens if they need any help is the first step towards providing relevant advice.
  • Divide their problem into two categories: what can be changed, and what cannot.
  • For things that can be changed, focus on the needs identified by your kid, and brainstorm for possible solutions.
  • For things that cannot be changed, help them come in terms with the circumstances that are not in one's control.

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IDEA EXTRACTED FROM:

Why Teenagers Reject Parents' Solutions to Their Problems

Why Teenagers Reject Parents' Solutions to Their Problems

https://www.nytimes.com/2020/02/18/well/family/why-teenagers-reject-parents-solutions-to-their-problems.html

nytimes.com

3

Key Ideas

Teenagers

Teenagers talk to parents about their problems and after being offered solutions and suggestions, dismiss the ideas provided as irritating, irrelevant or both.

Teens and adolescents may just need a venting outlet and will feel better simply by articulating their worries and problems.

Adults can provide them with mental space by listening to them without interrupting, letting them sort, survey and organize their thoughts.

Don't Instruct Adolescents

Solving any teenager problem is an exercise in futility, with broken hearts, social dramas and academic pressure making them split their heads every day.

Teens share their worries with us because they feel like sharing, and need empathy, not a solution. Reassuring and sincere words that make them feel better can be enough, and any solution offered will most probably backfire.

They may only need a vote of confidence and can easily turn well-intentioned guidance as criticism and lectures.

Moving Towards A Solution

  • Offering our kids an ear, empathy and encouragement helps them tremendously and moves the needle towards the best solution.
  • Asking teens if they need any help is the first step towards providing relevant advice.
  • Divide their problem into two categories: what can be changed, and what cannot.
  • For things that can be changed, focus on the needs identified by your kid, and brainstorm for possible solutions.
  • For things that cannot be changed, help them come in terms with the circumstances that are not in one's control.

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