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You will be misunderstood

Being misunderstood

Being misunderstood

You have a set of characteristics and a set of beliefs about you that has become your norm. Other people also have a set of beliefs about themselves and their lives. When you make a change to yourself, big or small, those around you will not fully understand or agree with you because:

  • you're not the same they're used to;
  • you're conflicting with their own set of beliefs.

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IDEA EXTRACTED FROM:

You will be misunderstood

You will be misunderstood

https://medium.com/the-ascent/you-will-be-misunderstood-c7ce27824923

medium.com

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Key Ideas

Being misunderstood

You have a set of characteristics and a set of beliefs about you that has become your norm. Other people also have a set of beliefs about themselves and their lives. When you make a change to yourself, big or small, those around you will not fully understand or agree with you because:

  • you're not the same they're used to;
  • you're conflicting with their own set of beliefs.

Any change can cause conflict

You don't have to do anything wrong; you just have to change. You’ll be teased, made fun of, joked about, frowned upon, mocked, or end up being excluded.

People around you may simply react to you for being different from themselves or the group. They still care about you, but just want the old you back and the group's identity to remain the same.

Hindering progress

The downside of a misunderstanding is that every tease, mock, or remark, regardless of how serious or mild it is, will affect you and question your choices.

The beginning is the hardest part when you'll need the most energy to avoid going back to your old self. For some, that's how the journey ends. Trying another time will be much harder because they'll also have the past failure to deal with.

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As cliche as that sounds. Most of us give up on something we’re passionate about too soon. But anyone who’s been successful has a tale of struggle and perseverance to share.

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Use moral framing

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Verbal violations
  • Not allowing you to speak or be heard.
  • Yelling at you.
  • Saying things that are derogatory about your integrity and character.
  • Gossiping about you.
Psychological/emotional boundary violations
  • Preying upon your sense of self and self-esteem
  • Using what you’ve told them in confidence against you
  • Lying to you
  • Criticizing you
  • Manipulating you
  • Mocking you
  • Making demands of your time
  • Bullying you
  • Lording a superior attitude over you
Physical violations
  • Moving into your personal space
  • Touching you without permission
  • Being inappropriate or too familiar towards you
  • Violating your privacy
  • Damaging or destroying your personal property
  • Threatening you with physical harm

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