Now with our social life in quarantine, calling a friend on a whim feels normal.
“How are you holding up?” Or, “How is quarantine treating you?” Or, “You guys ready to kill each other yet?”
These are very reasonably icebreakers right now, but also exhausting because none of us are doing exceptionally well.
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Instead of triggering more anxiety by rehashing your quarantine situations, think about what you can do to make your friends feel good and how to be there for them from a distance.
Tell them they matter to you and that you miss them. Then keep the conversation focused on things that make you both feel good.
Disruption and isolation have a way of encouraging us to electively re-evaluate our lives.
Many are abandoning habits or behaviors during this pandemic. Some vowed to care less about ladder climbing or to cut frustrating people out of their lives. Others have gone cold turkey on nail-biting or luxury online shopping.
Social distancing is causing people to change up their looks. With hair salons closed, people have resorted to cutting their long locks or shaving their heads, dying their hair blue or pink with box dye. Others are piercing their own ears and noses at home. The most adventurous is contemplating giving themselves quarantine stick-and-poke tattoos with kits they bought.
Most people do it out of necessity. But the urge to make yourself over is not just reacting to boredom. It is a more complicated coping mechanism.
Too much is expected of modern relationships: your partner is supposed to fulfil roles that historically used to be spread out within communal structures. Your partner is supposed to be your best friend, lover, psychotherapist, child-care co-worker, and dishwasher.
What is essential during a crisis is to create boundaries, routines, and rituals. As best as possible, separate daytime and evening, week time and weekend, working time and idle time, family time and individual time. Routine creates a structure and brings a certain sense of order.
❤️ Brainstash Inc.