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How To Talk About Literally Anything Else

Conversation suggestions

  • What’s something that made you smile or laugh this week?
  • What was the highlight of your day or week?
  • What have you been watching recently?
  • Have you read any good books or articles?
  • What’s your favorite podcast right now?
  • What have you been enjoying about working from home?
  • What have you been cooking?
  • Have you ordered out from any good restaurants lately?
  • What is making you feel most productive right now?
  • What is making you feel most at peace right now?
  • Have you found any fun ways to be creative?
  • What’s the most absurd thing you’ve seen on social media recently?
  • Where are you finding a sense of purpose right now?
  • What hobbies are you leaning into?
  • What are you doing to relax?

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IDEA EXTRACTED FROM:

How To Talk About Literally Anything Else

How To Talk About Literally Anything Else

https://forge.medium.com/how-to-talk-about-literally-anything-else-118b46a40fd0

forge.medium.com

6

Key Ideas

Exhausting icebreakers

Now with our social life in quarantine, calling a friend on a whim feels normal.

“How are you holding up?” Or, “How is quarantine treating you?” Or, “You guys ready to kill each other yet?”
These are very reasonably icebreakers right now, but also exhausting because none of us are doing exceptionally well.

How you can stay social

Instead of triggering more anxiety by rehashing your quarantine situations, think about what you can do to make your friends feel good and how to be there for them from a distance.

Tell them they matter to you and that you miss them. Then keep the conversation focused on things that make you both feel good.

Conversation suggestions

  • What’s something that made you smile or laugh this week?
  • What was the highlight of your day or week?
  • What have you been watching recently?
  • Have you read any good books or articles?
  • What’s your favorite podcast right now?
  • What have you been enjoying about working from home?
  • What have you been cooking?
  • Have you ordered out from any good restaurants lately?
  • What is making you feel most productive right now?
  • What is making you feel most at peace right now?
  • Have you found any fun ways to be creative?
  • What’s the most absurd thing you’ve seen on social media recently?
  • Where are you finding a sense of purpose right now?
  • What hobbies are you leaning into?
  • What are you doing to relax?

Concerning emotional support

  • What can I do to support you right now?
  • What is making you feel better?
  • When you think about next year, what makes you the most excited?
  • When have you felt the most supported in the past week or so?
  • When have you felt most hopeful in the past week or so?

Concerning life and relationships

  • What’s your first memory of me?
  • What’s your favorite memory of us together?
  • How did you meet your best friend or other best friends?
  • What’s an uncommon belief you hold?
  • What’s something you’d like to learn more about?
  • What is the most exciting thing you’ve learned in the past few months?
  • How do you define trust? What do you do to show trust in relationships?
  • What’s something I don’t already know about you?
  • What are your hidden talents?
  • What do you consider your biggest life accomplishment?
  • What’s your favorite childhood memory?
  • What person had the biggest positive impact on you as a child, and why?
  • Who do you really look up to, and why?

Comments that can help

  • I love you.
  • I miss you.
  • We’ll get through this together.
  • I’m here for you.
  • I was thinking about you recently when I saw/read…
  • I’d love to tell you about my day.
  • I’m grateful to be able to talk to you.
  • Let me tell you about this amazing show I’m watching/podcast I’m listening to/book I’m reading…
  • Let me tell you about this amazing recipe I made…
  • Remember that time when we…
  • When this all ends, I can’t wait to do… with you.

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During the pandemic, being at home with a partner reveals the "invisible work" they're doing, which may be taken for granted. This expanded view of ourselves and our partners can go in two directions.

  • In one direction, you are curious and say, "I never knew. I really appreciate it. I realize how I let you do everything." It becomes a source of connection.
  • It the other direction, it becomes a source of blame where you want to complain and tell your partner just how much you are doing. This way, you're not going to get help.

How people should fight

Couples go through harmony, disharmony, and repair. So they will inevitably get into arguments. However, what matters is how you fight. Don't highlight everything negative while taking the positive for granted.

  • Start by saying to yourself, "What are the one or two things that they have done that I can appreciate?" If you start with that, you will fight differently.

  • Stay focussed on the one thing that you're upset about at this moment. Don't end up talking about other things.

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Change Your Actions

The scenario of a life turned upside down can be improved by:

  • Monitoring the quality of one’s input.
  • Pushing yourself for some exercise, which is sure to beat the blues.
  • Reading actual paper newspapers instead of mobile phone articles.
  • More fresh food, less processed food.
  • Working with work clothes on, not pajamas.
  • Bringing a change in routine and scenery.

Improvement with learning

From the moment we are born, we are always learning new skills. We see it in formal capacities in school or on the job, and informally, like learning from you buddy how to grill a steak.

Tony Robbins

Tony Robbins

“One skill you want to master in this day and age we live in, if you want to have an extraordinary life, is the ability to learn rapidly.”

Select your skill carefully

Be very selective in the skill you're trying to masker to avoid sabotaging your success:

  • Make sure it's applicable: The perfect skill either solves a problem you have or scratches an itch you have.
  • Be very specific: Specific goals are easier to pursue than vague counterparts. To set yourself up, narrow your skill down as much as possible. Ask what specific problem are you trying to solve, and find out what aspects you find most fascinating.
  • Make sure you love the process, not just the outcome: Pick a skill where the road is as exciting as the outcome. Then plan out celebration points along the way.

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