Behavior Patterns Of HCP - Deepstash
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Behavior Patterns Of HCP

Everybody has bad days or weeks. To tell if someone is a High Conflict Person, we can look for four traits of behavior.

  1. Lots of all-or-nothing thinking: When problems arise, it is their solution or no solution. They don't compromise or listen to different points of view.
  2. Intense or unmanaged emotions: HCPs become very emotional about their points of view. Their responses are out of proportion to whatever is happening.
  3. Extreme behavior or threats: They engage in extreme negative behavior that includes physical harm, spreading lies about someone else, emotional manipulation, or obsessive contact.
  4. A preoccupation with blaming others: They frequently blame other people close to them or people in authority over them.

Nobody is perfect, but if someone has all four traits, they almost certainly are an HCP.

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Identifying Toxic People: Emotions To Look For

  • Extreme emotions are signs of possible trouble: extreme charm, extreme love, extreme anger.
  • Someone that carefully controls their emotions until they lose it, then they become unrecognizable in their lack of control.
  • Other emotions...

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High-conflict people (HCP)

  1. Narcissistic HCPs: They may seem charming at first but think themselves to be superior. They insult, humiliate, mislead, and lack empathy while demanding respect and attention.
  2. Borderline HCPs: They start out friendly but can suddenly change into b...

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Toxic People: Never Trigger Their Deepest Fears

  • Narcissistic HCPs fear disrespect. They act in such a way that people inevitably lose respect for them.
  • Borderline HCPs fear abandonment. They are a nonstop emotional that makes everyone run away from them.
  • Antisocial HCPs fear con...

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How You'lll Most Likely Feel Around Toxic People

  • With Narcissistic HCPs: You may feel stupid or inadequate. You may feel in awe and flattered that the person is spending time with you.
  • With Borderline HCPs: You will want to yell at then to get them to stop behaving in some inappropriate way.

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People That Cause Grief

People That Cause Grief

We all know a few people that cause grief, not merely because they have a bad day but because they have severe problems and are unwilling to change.

We can learn enough to recognize if someone is a "high-conflict person" and avoid them as much as possible.

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Identifying Toxic People: Words To Look For

Each type of toxic people gives clues if you pay attention:

  • Narcissistic HCPs: Words that indicate arrogance, entitlement, and a lack of empathy.
  • Borderline HCPs: They have victim narratives. You’ll empathize with them because their life kee...

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Method For Handling HCPs

If you are in a situation where you cannot avoid a high conflict person, use the 4-step CARS method.

  • Connect with empathy, attention, and respect. With narcissists and antisocials, emphasize respect. With borderlines, focus on empathy.
  • Analy...

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anthony_ov

You can't have love without self-love.

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Types of empathy gaps

  • Cold-to-hot empathy gaps. When someone is in a cold (emotionally neutral) state, they have trouble understanding someone in a hot (emotional state). A calm person might be unable to predict how they will act when they're upset.
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