The fragile, non-resilient approach to change - Deepstash
Managing Perfectionism

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How to manage anxiety and self-doubt

Strategies for setting realistic goals

The importance of self-compassion and self-care

Managing Perfectionism

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The fragile, non-resilient approach to change

The fragile, non-resilient approach to change

The problem when we try to change make changes in our lives:

  • We set out to do something regularly (for example, exercise, meditate or write something)
  • We fail at it
  • We might beat ourselves up, get discouraged, and give up.

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Failure helps systems get stronger

We can make human-made systems more anti-fragile by designing ways that stress will make the system better able to handle stress.

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The idea of anti-fragility

The idea of anti-fragility

It comes from Nassim Nicholas Taleb’s book Black Swan. The main idea is that many human-made systems are fragile. Something comes to stress the system, and it falls apart. Some systems are robust or resilient, which is much better than fragile.

Even better is the idea of b...

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Key ideas for Anti-Fragility

  • Expect failures.
  • Create systems that are able to get stronger with stresses & failure.
  • Removing fragility from systems.
  • Take small risks often.
  • Embrace uncertainty, risk and discomfort.
  • Keep the "always learn & get better from failure" attitude.

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carson_

Running away from your problems is a race you`ll never win.

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  • We are geniuses at coming up with reasons to avoid change, we make excuses, we rationalize.
  • When we bluntly challenge ourselves to figure out what we can change and what we can't, what to loose and what to keep, we often surprise ourselves with the bold simlpicity of our answers.

Cultivating and Developing Creativity

There are three ways to further our creativity into our lives:

  1. Do something without caring about the results - this is to help lower our expectations and to loosen ourselves up and reduce the internal pressure we have on ourselves
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Seeking change as adults

As adults, when we want to change something we might seek help - join a gym, or take lessons, or see a coach. Regarding DILT, the teachers often teach from the bottom up. They give classes and tools and continue to encourage us.

But, people prefer efficiency instead of effectivenes...

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