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How to get beyond small talk

Ask open-ended questions that invite people to tell stories, rather than one-word answers.

Instead of "How was your day?" try, "What did you do today?" Other open-ended questions to try:

  • "What's your story?"
  • "What's the strangest thing about where you grew up?"
  • "What's the most interesting thing that happened at work today?"
  • "How'd you end up in your line of work?"
  • "What was the best part of your weekend?"
  • "What are you looking forward to this week?"
  • "Who do you think is the luckiest person in this room?"

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Practice the art of disruption

Practice the art of disruption

When small talk dries up, it's often due to "mirroring." In our efforts to be polite, we answer questions directly, repeat their observations, or just agree with whatever they say.

For example, one person would say, "It's a beautiful day," and we might answer, "Yes, it's a beautiful da...

90

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Leapfrog over the expected response

A way to carry on a conversation is to skip over the expected response.
Instead of:
Ron: "How was your flight?"
Carlos: "My flight was good."
Carlos could be bold and say, "I'd be more intrigued by an airline where your ticket price was ...

83

594 reads

Awkward conversations with strangers

Awkward conversations with strangers

In a situation where people are gathered together, it always involves people trying to talk to each other. In these moments, we often fall short and can't think of anything to say, or worse; we fumble through with the aim of not crashing.

However, we can soar in conversations and learn to ...

86

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lilhh

I have a passion for architecture. Always eager to learn new things.

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MORE LIKE THIS

Try to implore interesting questions

Try to implore interesting questions

“What’s your story?”

“What did you do today?”

“What’s the strangest thing about where you grew up?”

“What’s the most interesting thing that happened at work today?”

“How’d you end up in your line of work?”

“What does your name mean?

What would you like it to m...

How to get better at small talk

How to get better at small talk

  • Have a genuine interest in getting to know a person you’re talking to and learn from them.
  • Ask open-ended questions. It encourages the other person you're speaking with to open up.“What do you do?” followed by “Why did you choose that type of work? How did you enter ...

How to ask better questions

  • Ask open-ended questions: they unlock more information from people
  • Ask “why” 3 times:  the easiest way to deepen the level of a conversation
  • Ask about specifics, not generalizations
  • Frame questions around a person’s reactions to experiences...

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