What makes a great listener

Asking great questions;
Playing attention to the nonverbal communication;
Forgoing taking detailed notes to pay better attention;
Listening with the intent to understand, not the intent to respond;
Making people feel heard;
Following up on what matters.

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IDEA EXTRACTED FROM:

How to Master the Art of Listening

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Communication

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Common communication mistakes
Lack of attention to tone. No matter what the circumstances, learn to pay attention to tone. Before you speak, pause and take a breath. One-size-fits-all communication . Different people have different needs and expectations. Avoiding the difficult conversation. Everybody faces conflict.Provide clear and actionable feedback, even when it is difficult for you. Reacting instead of responding. Before reacting with anger and frustration, pause to reflect.Then respond in stead of react. Indulging in gossip. Leave no place for gossip if you want to be trusted and esteemed as a communicator. Speaking more and listening less. When you listen more than you speak, you open yourself up to learning and empathy. Thinking you are being understood. Take the time to check that people have understood your message.
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Being A Great Listener
Focus on what’s being said instead of how it affects you or what you want to say. Put away your phone. It’s rude and multitasking takes away from comprehension. Ask follow-up and confirmation questions . This shows you’re listening and care about what’s been said. Practice reflective listening . Paraphrase in your own words the meaning of what’s being said to guarantee you’ve interpreted it correctly. By doing this, you give the speaker the opportunity to clarify what she meant to say. Use positive body language: Use an enthusiastic tone, uncross your arms, maintaining eye contact. Don’t judge . This doesn’t require that you believe or agree with them, it only means you understand. Talk less . If not checking for understanding or asking a probing question, you shouldn’t be talking.
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Awkward Work Scenarios
Others taking credit for your work: speak up when presenting your joint ideas, else the boss will remember that the other was the one who did all the talking. Overanalyzing your tone or watering down criticism: understand the difference between sounding arrogant and assertive. Noisy coworkers: work somewhere else in the office or record the noises that you make during a workday—maybe the noises aren’t as bad as you think. Beign interrupted during meetings: to speak with authority and presence you need to feel worth listening to, and you can develop it for yourself. Making friends in the office: invite a coworker to lunch or ask to join a group of them. People are often happy to have new additions. Firing a hard worker that isn’t good enough: set clear benchmarks, and let them know what will happen if they don’t meet them. You want to leave early but others work late: talk to your boss if there is no reason for the extra time. Your employees don’t respect you: project confidence in your new role, then be specific and clear about your expectations. Interviewing while pregnant: it’s an opportunity to show your resourcefulness and preparation. Be ready with a plan for minimizing the impact of your absence. You don't want to attend to happy hour : try coming up with some time during work to bond–like lunch or family-friendly weekend events.
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7 Essential Crisis Negotiation Skills Of a NYPD Negotiator
Communication : Opening communication avenues to your counterpart signals you are ready to listen and builds rapport between you. Patience : Allowing your counterpart to air concerns and not jumping to conclusions or rushing towards a resolution also builds rapport. Active Listening : An affective skill that helps to maintain an open dialogue and build trust between counterparts also doubling as information gathering. Respect : Makes your counterpart feel understood and that their concerns are being heard and addressed. Calm : its display helps the counterpart feel there is an alternative way to taking harsh measures. Self-Awareness : It's establishing a relationship with the counterpart while keeping communications strategic and purposeful. Adaptability : Is to adapt and respond to changing circumstances in a way that further negotiation goals.
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