The 5 Core Skills Of Hostage Negotiators
"We all need to be good listeners and learn to demonstrate our empathy and understanding of the problems, needs, and issues of others. Only then can we hope to influence their behavior in a positive way.”
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To use communication skills to get a person to change from a negative behavior to a more desirable one.
In crisis situations a person’s actions is heavily based on emotions, at the expense of rationality. A negotiator seeks to reduce the negative emotions and bring back a more rational thinking process through the use of active listening, timing, empathy, rapport building, influence and control.
By strategically using open-ended questions, emotional labeling, mirroring/reflecting, silence, and paraphrasing, active listening allows the negotiator to gather information on the other person and simultaneously demonstrate empathy and rapport, thus reducing their negative emotions.
To influence someone it's necessary to show an understanding of their current emotions and behaviors; to have empathy. This can be done by attentively listening.
Building rapport involves giving the person your attention, being positive and ensuring verbal and nonverbal communication are congruent.
You also have to keep control of yourself, especially your emotions, as negative displays of emotion by you can escalate the situation.
After using the other crisis negotiations skills you can pursue the final goal, to nudge someone else’s frame of mind towards a positive outcome.
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They aim to reconcile a counterpart’s problems with the need to maintain the peace for society at large.
Using active-listening techniques, maintaining an open-minded approach, and building rapport to influence one’s counterpart are some of the skills used to resolve conflict and this skills can also be used on other kinds of negotiation.
Is to seek to hold the attention of a conversation on oneself. It occasionally manifests on the average person when we pretend to be listening, but we were really focusing on what we wa...
Is to not judge or analyze what the person is saying at first. Just focusing on listening and trying to understand their perspective.
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First off, you can't get angry too because then there are two angry people.
Tell yourself they are having a bad day. Don't try to shut them up or talk over them. It doesn't ...
Active listening has three components:
Paraphrase: Repeat what they have said in your own words. "If I understand correctly... "
Inquire: "You mentioned you found our proposed price unacceptable. Help me understand how you came to this conclusion?"
Acknowledge: "It sounds as if you're quite disappointed with..."
Active listening should be maintained throughout the conversation.
It also includes body language:
You don't want to argue over the phone or email as they are stripped of facial expressions and gestures and unwittingly simulating a blank emotional radar.
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There are 3 key questions you should ask yourself:
It means finding the doorway that you want to enter the negotiation through. That could be the doorway of safety and liability or of value, the doorway of competition or of future business.
That signature is the habitual way that you go about a negotiation. Understanding your default signature helps you know what you're working with.
Some people try to go in and beat the other person up on price. Other people are really intimidated, reticent, and afraid to ask for anything.
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Specific vocational skills are essential - coders should be able to code, salespeople should be able to sell. But, we also need soft skills. By only focusing on the seemingly essential skills...
Organizations know how to measure vocational skills. They know how to measure typing skills for example. However, they are less able to measure passion or commitment.
Organizations hire and fire based on vocational skill output. But, getting rid of a negative thinker or a bully is much more difficult. An employee that demoralizes an entire team is hampering productivity.
If you've got the vocational skills, you're of little help without the human skills. The soft skills, or rather real skills, can't replace vocational skills, but amplify the things you've already been measuring.
For instance, a team member with all the traditional vocational skills is the baseline. Add to that perceptive, charismatic, driven, focused, goal-setting, inspiring, motivated, deep listener, and you have a team member that will benefit the organization in exponential ways.
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