Conflict Style: The Accommodator

The always obliging accommodators yield too much, sacrificing their own needs in the process. They start to be pushovers, as people take advantage of their accommodating nature.

The way for them to say a ‘no’ to an unfair request is to say: ‘That doesn’t work for me.’

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Career

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The People We Argue With At Work
  • It is inevitable to disagree with colleagues, bosses and coworkers at work.
  • People deploy varied techniques and styles when they clash with their work colleagues, but there are no guidelines on how we work through the conflict.
  • It also depends on if we are trying to ensure that the relationship isn’t damaged, or just focused on getting the result.
  • It is all about priorities, and being successful in hustling with others can lead to success at the cost of being alienated by others and losses in the long term.

Some coworkers see a problem and address it is to a person higher up, with more power. They think raising problems with superiors will get the clout and power they need or will lead to a quick resolution. Whatever their intention, no one likes someone going behind their back and this tactic often backfires.

Though it is a good strategy for addressing conflicts like harassment or toxic work environments, involving higher-ups for simple disagreements is just a waste of time and energy.

Some personality types argue for the sake of it. The problem may be personal, fake or non-existent, but they cannot be upfront about that. The argument is part of their deception to cover the real problem.

One needs to see through them and find out the real reasons why they are talking in circles.

Competitors focus on the result, and have an assertive and uncooperative working style.

They can make people give-in to their demands by their imposing, aggressive nature, but even if they get the results they want and do well in their jobs, their conflict style makes people hostile towards them, leading to lack of teamwork and idea sharing.

A person avoiding conflicts will ensure the work relationship does not turn sour, and will let conflicts go. While it may make things easy, their own voice is stifled, and their silence comes off as inaction.

If we see a coworker completely avoiding arguments, we may need to probe a little so that we know what they need.

Dealmakers negotiate both ways and bargain to get results, even if there is some compromise involved. They know that neither party can get exactly what they want, and move towards the middle path.

Dealmakers can also make false promises and be less honest about the long-term facts, so it is good to read the fine print.

Collaborators take everyone’s ideas into account and try to reach a consensus. This mode of conflict may sound idealistic, but there are some pitfalls. Collaborators can start being manipulative and less transparent about everyone’s input. They can also promise to everyone but then be unable to keep the promise, leading to distrust.

Collaborators need to be transparent and set the right expectations to their co-workers.

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Interpersonal Issues

When it happens in the workplace, it can reduce productivity and make a dent in morale. 

It takes on the shape that one person, or a group of people, frustrates or hampers another person or group's efforts at achieving a goal. This isn’t always done on purpose.

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IDEAS

Conflict in virtual teams

...is more likely to escalate because:

  • Colleagues are more likely to take disagreements personally when they don't have the context, nuance or even the facial expressions of the other person they are engaging with.
  • Communication is often impersonal, so it encourages a back and forth that escalates more quickly than during in-person encounters.
Effective communication

... is imperative for every successful business. Poor communication inevitably causes misunderstandings, confusion and conflicts that hinder productivity and professional relationships.

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